Things To Ponder |
1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow. 2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail. 3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably ...
Posted by Derek on Tue, 28 Nov 2006 11:03:00 PST |
Van Gogh's Family Tree |
Van Gogh's Family Tree His dizzy aunt -- Verti Gogh The brother who ate prunes -- Gotta Gogh The brother who worked at a convenience store -- Stop N. Gogh The grandfather from Yugoslavia -- U Gogh The...
Posted by Derek on Wed, 08 Nov 2006 12:47:00 PST |
Donkey |
An old man, a boy & a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey & the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking...
Posted by Derek on Tue, 03 Oct 2006 10:29:00 PST |
Non-Living Genders |
You may not know this but many nonliving thingshave a gender.1) Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, yet you can see right through them.2) Copiers are Female, because once turned off...
Posted by Derek on Tue, 03 Oct 2006 11:13:00 PST |
Tech Support |
Dear Tech Support:Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In add...
Posted by Derek on Wed, 27 Sep 2006 10:30:00 PST |
Murphy sucks |
Murphy's Lesser-Known Dictums:Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.He who laughs last, thinks slowest.Those who live by the sword get shot b...
Posted by Derek on Mon, 25 Sep 2006 08:45:00 PST |
HAHA |
There was a 10 year old boy walking down the sidewalk dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He walked up to a house of ill repute and knocked on the door.When the Madam answered it, she sa...
Posted by Derek on Fri, 22 Sep 2006 05:42:00 PST |
Woman's Perfect Breakfast |
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFASTShe's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.Her boyfriend is on the cover of P...
Posted by Derek on Fri, 11 Aug 2006 08:17:00 PST |
Dear Diary |
Dear Diary,Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double pane energy-efficientkind. Then, this week I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaini...
Posted by Derek on Fri, 11 Aug 2006 04:41:00 PST |
Warning From Pakistan |
This morning, from a cave somewhere in Pakistan, Taliban Minister ofMigration, Mohammed Omar, warned the United States that if militaryaction against Iraq continues, Taliban authorities will cut off A...
Posted by Derek on Tue, 18 Jul 2006 02:58:00 PST |
