Tracia Meretrix Aurelia - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Our Lager,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink.
Thy will be drunk,
I will be drunk,
At home as it is in the tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
and forgive us our spillages,
as we forgive those who spill against us.
And lead us not to incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers.
For Thine is the beer, the bitter, THE lager.
Bar Bitch.
~"The Beer Prayer" courtesey of Erik
Will I wake up
Is it a dream I made up
No I guess it's reality
What will change us
Or will we mess up
Our only chance to connect
With a dream
Say a prayer for me
Say a prayer for me
Say a prayer for me
I'm buried by the sound
In a world of human
Wreckage
In a world of human
Wreckage
In a world of human
Wreckage
I'm lost and I'm found
And I can't touch the
Ground
I'm plowed into the sound
To see wide open
With a head that's broken
Hang a life on a tragedy
Plow me under the ground
That covers the message
That is the seed
Say a prayer for me
Say a prayer for me
Say a prayer for me
I'm buried by the sound
In a world of human
Wreckage
In a world of human
Wreckage
In a world of human
Wreckage
I'm lost and I'm found
And I can't touch the
Ground
~Sponge, Plowed
I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain, the only thing that's real. The needle tears a hole, the old familiar sting. Try to kill it all away, but I remember everything. What have I become, my sweetest friend? Everyone I know goes away in the end. And you could have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt. I wear this crown of shit, upon my liar's chair, full of broken thoughts, I cannot repair. Beneath the stains of time, the feelings disappear. You are someone else. I am still right here. What have I become, my sweetest friend? Everyone I know goes away in the end. And you could have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt. If I could start again, a million miles away, I would keep myself. I would find a way. ~NIN, Hurt
"Nobody loves me...It's true!" ~Portishead, Sour times
Leave it to me to fuck something up.
Long Live the Long Hair!
June 4th through June 11th..."Well, this is a disaster!"
"A hangover is the wrath of grapes." ~Erik
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The breakdown of White Trash: People from the 909/951 (You're not fooling anybody), White Trash, Hicks, Rednecks, Southern Rednecks, Hillbillies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"We hate love. We love hate." ~Marilyn Manson
"The only difference between suicide and martydom is press coverage." ~Panic! at the Disco
"Only suicide will save you from yourself." ~Slayer
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Shoes? Fuck Shoes!"
Fuck People Who Act Like Children!
Fuck STALKERS!!! (Yeah, YOU Asshole!)
Fuck the Waitress at BJs!
Fuck the Blond Bitch at the Key Club!
Fuck Short English Boys!
Fuck Hicks Who Want Me To Hold Their Hand!
Fuck Mountain Bitches!
Fuck Abusive Boyfriends!
Fuck the Duchess of York!
Fuck Nice Boys who have No Time!
Fuck Drama!
Fuck North Hollywood!
Fuck Merlot!
Fuck Blue Drinks!
Fuck Disney!
Fuck FedEx/Kinkos!
Fuck Apples/MACS/iPods!
Fuck Racist People!
Fuck The Wind!
Fuck The Boxes!
Fuck MySpace (It's the Devil!)
Fuck Water!
..

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My Interests

Travel, Classics, Alcohol, Body Art, Riding my Dirt Bike, Snowboarding, Partying in Vegas, Fast Cars.

I love to travel. 12 countries on 4 continents and counting. I like to drink and enjoy an occasional smoke. I LOVE wine! I'm in the process of building my own personal cellar. I love riding my dirt bike, but don't do it near enough. I like to go to concerts/shows/gigs, whatever. I enjoy a good book, and sometimes I write crappy poetry. I have no niche. Travel is my passion. I just like to be me, however screwed up that may be. If you can't handle me then you don't need to be in my life.

I'd like to meet:

My soulmate.

Music:

I like Rock. I like punk rock. metal. and anythinig that makes me feel. Music is about feeling. I can't express all the feelings I have, thus I can't express all the music I like.

I stare as my weak knees wilt,
Longing trying to touch the embrace that has left me.
And I had you.
And your kindness was there.
Now pieces of you hate me.
I am not a portrait on your heart no more,
But I still kiss the feelings that emerge from my pulse.
And memories seep from my eyes,
Knowing that love has gone further,
Than my soft hand can reach.
The utmost apology is what I can lay on your face but,
Will you still swallow me whole?
Nothing can compare,
And you continue to dance in me,
And I continue to bleed.
But nothing can compare,
I have killed the one thing that exceeds my existence.

Walls of Jericho, Angel

I've been thinking it over.
And I know just what to do.
I've been thinking it over.
And I know I just can't trust myself.

I'm a Gypsy prince.
Covered with diamonds and jewels.
But then my lover exposes me.
I know I'm just a damn fool.

I give what I've got to give.
I give what I need to live.
I give what I've got to give.
It's important if I wanna live.
I wanna live.
I want to live my life.
I wanna live.
I want to live my life.

As I load my pistol.
Of fine German steel.
I never thought I'd be so down and out.
Having my last meal.
But I know I can do it.
It just took a few years.
As I execute my killer.
The morning is near.

The Ramones, I Wanna Live

I never thought, I'd die alone, I laughed the loudest, who'd have known? I traced the cord back to the wall. No wonder it was never plugged in at all. I took my time. I hurried up. The choice was mine, I didn't think enough. I'm too depressed to go on. You'll be sorry when I'm gone. I never conquered rarely came. 16 just held such better days. Days when I still felt alive. We couldn't wait to get outside. The world was wide, too late to try. The tour was over, I'd survived. I couldn't wait till I got home. To pass the time in my room alone. I never thought I'd die alone. Another six months I'll be unknown. Give all my things to all my friends. You'll never set foot in my room again. You'll close it off, board it up. Remember the time that I spilled the cup, of apple juice in the hall. Please tell mom this is not her fault. I never conquered, rarely came. But tomorrow holds such better days. Days when I can still feel alive. When I can't wait to get outside. The world is wide, the time goes by. The tour is over, I've survived. I can't wait till I get home. To pass the time in my room alone.
Blink 182, Adam's SongWill Smith, Switch Sisscor Sisters, Filty & Gorgeous Damian Marley, Welcome to Jamrock Portis Head, Sour Times She Wants Revenge, These Things Lynyrd Skynyrd, Sweet Home Alabama Atmosphere, Don't ever Fucking Question that

Movies:

Detroit Rock City, SLC Punk!, Thank You for Smoking, American Beauty, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Pirates, Matrix Trilogy, Gone in 60 Seconds, Monster, Boondock Saints, A funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, Titus, Empire Records, Dazed and Confused, Snakes on a Plane, Bend it Like Beckham, Anchorman, 40 Year Old Virgin, Wedding Crashers, Nacho Libre, Old School, Napoleon Dynamite, Cold Mountain, Troy, Chicago, Quills, Austin Powers, American History X, Love Actually, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, A Clockwork Orange, Snakes on a Plane, Michael Moore, Kevin Smith, Jack Black, Adam Sandler, Kiera Knightly, Jim Carey, Monty Python

Television:

The Sopranos, ROME, Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy, CSI: Las Vegas, Miami, New York, Without a Trace, The Simpsons, King of the Hill, Weeds, House

Books:

Anne Rice: Beauty Trilogy, Pandora, Queen of the Damned, Belinda
Stephen King: Bag of Bones, Everything's Eventual, Carrie, Hearts in Atlantis, The Long Walk
Danielle Steel:
Christopher Krovatin: Heavy Metal and You
Paulo Coelho: Veronika Decides to Die
Elie Wiesel: Night
Benjamin Jacobs: The Dentist of Auschwitz
Janet Fitch: White Oleander
Sylvia Plath: The Bell Jar, Aerial
Ernest Hemmingway: The Old Man and the Sea, The Sun Also Rises
John Steinbeck: East of Eden
Dennis Lehane: Gone Baby Gone
George Orwell: Killing an Elephant, 1984, Animal Farm
Dan Brown: Angels and Demons, The DaVinci Code
Charles Frazier: Cold Mountain, Thirteen Moons
Thomas Hardy: Tess of the D'Ubervilles
Charlotte Bronte: Jane Eyre
Emily Bronte: Wuthering Heights
Michael Ondaatje: The English Patient
Hunter Thompson: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream
JK Rowling: Harry Potter
Nataniel Hawthorne: The Scarlet Letter
Arthur Miller: Death of a Salesman, The Crucible
Rex Pickett: Sideways
Anita Shreve: Sea Glass, The Pilot's Wife

Heroes:

Once you said you'd stick to it until the end. I guess you lied, they call it suicide. Now you're gone. What was so wrong that you couldn't find a way to carry on? Second guess. Did I do my best? There was a friend I had. Johnny was a weirdo. So what did you expect? I ain't no fucking hero. I'm just trying to survive myself. I should have known you went through it alone I wonder why did you even try? You could have come to me. I would have helped you see. You could have found a way to carry on. Second guess. Did i do my best? There was a friend I had...Johnny was a weirdo. So what did you expect? I ain't no fucking hero. I'm just trying to survive myself Johnny's strange behavior was a tip-off, they say. But I ain't no fucking savior. I'm just living day by day. Little things, little lives hanging 'til the end. I say it doesn't really mean nothing. Telling truth, telling lies. I used to have a friend. I say it don't really mean nothing. And I can't let this feeling go. Let this feeling go. Let this feeling go
The Offspring, No Hero

My Blog

Just in case you should care

So I know I haven't been keeping up with all of you. I make and drop tentative plans, don't phone back, and for the most part seem to have partially disapeared. So for those who care, here...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Thu, 12 Jul 2007 05:00:00 PST

Friday, July 28, 2006

So the night started out pretty normal. Got dressed, got in the car and hit the 710 on my way to Crystal's house. The game plan: Dive bar hop round her area looking for a place that ...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Sat, 29 Jul 2006 12:56:00 PST

"HIM"

Take me away. Take me tomorrow. Don't let me stay here, And feel all these things again. Don't leave me alone. Don't let me do this anymore. Don't leave me to feel, All these things I've felt for ...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Wed, 10 May 2006 09:14:00 PST

Haunted

Why did I try so hard to please you? Nothing was ever good enough. I did all I could. I'd take all your crap. I'd bust my ass. But what did it get me? Where are we now? You do everything for her that ...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Mon, 08 May 2006 01:19:00 PST

My Very Succint Opinion of the Immigration Issue...go ahead and debate with me!

I've traveled to foreign countries and for the sake of not offending anyone, I did what I had to do to best conform to their culture. I was as courteous as I could be if I didn't know the langua...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Wed, 03 May 2006 10:00:00 PST

About the Olympics

Here's a lil somethin I put together in the grocery store after seeing a really bad ad for the Olympics...No biggie. Red, White and Blue, Red, White and You. Please! Asian Bitches can kiss my ass...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 09:12:00 PST

Work in Progress

I spit on your judgement, Your thoghtless soul, Your holier than tho persona.I want to grab your neck, Pluck out your hairs, One by one until you plead,No! Tracy, No! Spare me, I ...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Sat, 25 Mar 2006 07:44:00 PST

Life is Just a Bunch of Monkey Jizz!

Why did I get out of bed today? Everyone is out to make me pay. I can't take this daily grind anymore. I'm tired of living life like the poor. And when it seemed like there might be some hope, ...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Fri, 10 Mar 2006 08:22:00 PST

"October 26, 2001 - At Work"

October 26, 2001 - At WorkMy first, So far my only.Sweet pride upon it's attainment, But now constant grief, &n...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Tue, 11 Oct 2005 10:24:00 PST

"Perfect Whore"

Perfect Whore Knife cut my flesh, Fire scour my skin. Pray yourself to sleep, whore. Love and be hurt, Hate and be safe. Pray yourself to sleep, whore. Constant betrayl, Constant hypocray. Pray yourse...
Posted by Tracia Meretrix Aurelia on Tue, 11 Oct 2005 10:21:00 PST