I am a very intriguing figure in the world of international secret societies. Marsupials of all kinds love me. I know how to juggle chainsaws and fire at the same time. Many days ago I attained an enlightened state of mind but, than forgot everything I learned. I know how to make a suit of shining armour out of tinfoil and swords made of paper machete. I can grow cantaloupes that look like watermelons and make pink lemon aide that tastes like root beer. I once ran a marathon in under two hours and still had enough energy to coach a little league team to a World Series title. I was once asked to lecture on bridge building in Central Africa. I know how to dehydrogenate water and make pancakes out of clay. I am an outlaw in Chile and a God-like figure on several islands in the South Seas. When I sailed around the world three seagulls never left my sight. I have written a short story that became a full length film. I built a 70 story Gingerbread house out of vanilla wafers. I am a man of many talents, an expert in love, and a modern day Holden Caufield. I receive fan mail from Southeast Asia and Northern Finland. I can cook a 7 course French dinner in under 20 minutes and children love my storytelling abilities. I need no introductions. The CIA and British Intelligence once offered me 5 million dollars for my martini making skills. I know every single zip and area code in the US. I know how to buy cotton, polish rice, and grow wheat. I wrestle water buffaloes on lunch breaks and I am Jim Morrison's best friend. I am up for a Nobel Prize in Comics and I can cook, clean, and polish. I am a Zen Master, a Jedi Knight, and Mother Nature was my mistress. My life is sponsored by the letter E. My watch keeps time on a 25 hour day and I built a car that travels at the speed of light. However, the lights don't work. I need to work on that one. I would enjoy meeting someone who can speak with wisdom like a child and loves beauty. Whatever that means to you means alot to me.
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