Jesse profile picture

Jesse

Uno mas cerveza, por favor!!

About Me

So there I was, back in the Raq, knee deep in sand and smelly Haji's...dealing with those crazy bastards run'n over our soldiers while waiting in line for the PX...eating sand covered food...sand fleas and camel spiders...Scuds and Patriot missiles going off at all times of the night...long hot ass convoys...FAST FORWARD TO NOW: Liv'n in pimp ass Scottsdale, kick ass apartment complex, neighbors and just liv'n life to the fullest. My name is Jesse and I'm 28 going on 19, I spent six years in the Army jumping out of planes, eat'n snakes and enjoying the beautiful sights of Southwest Asia (sarcasm). So right now I'm just making up for lost time. I did the college thang for a lil' bit, changed my degree about 5 million times and somehow ended up with a real job, (thanks to my buddy from the Army, love you Padilla)which had nothing to do with what I was going to school for. No more sleeping in for me but yet I still rock out during the weekends...sometimes you have to show the young'ens how to balance work and play, I guess the Army taught me that if you train hard, you play hard! The Valley is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I'm going to have to steal this little line from Iowa and Field of Dreams... *Is this heaven...no its Arizona!*" border=0
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My Interests

Old Town is pretty much the standard on the weekends and us Iowa kids kinda take over Devils on Saturdays. I enjoy hang'n by the bar and putting out the vibe...cruz'n the strip for 4-h babes...and going streaking through the quad to the gymnasium....BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY I love quoting dumb lines from movies!! I like to play softball, volleyball, and football or whatever else we can get ourselves into...Oh our biggest hobby is playing guitar hero and rock band at about 3am during after hours!

I'd like to meet:

Below you'll see the Super Bowl party video at my old apartment complex University House from two years ago...The greatest place to live, well while we lived there anyway, I make a cameo about halfway through the video. Of course right before Jocelyn is making out with another chick...AZ is the bestest in the westest!! I love fat girls with low self esteem, you know, the ones that you can tell them to do something and they'll do it! She better know how to cook and clean. Mandatory that she is barefoot and pregnant at all times and never leaves the kitchen unless she is cleaning some part of the house. Oh and the girl has to have a sense of humor, or we just won't get along.Also I'd prefer to meet a girl that doesn't use her hair straightener as a weapon. Holy shit Sheila! I can't believe you just hit me in the face with your hair straightener! Honostly who does that? Oh and don't think I forgot about you Jen and the remote control from across the hotel room. Oh and why did you have to throw the key of my four wheeler into the pool Val? Well at least you pushed me in to get it from behind with all my clothes on, and my cell phone in my pocket. Oh and how many mormon girls are out here? Can we just put a mark on them before you even begin to waste your time, like make them have to ride around on bicycles while wearing helmets and backpacks...oh wait we already do, do that? NEVERMIND!HA HA Man I know how to pick'em!!! I seem to have a problem with girlfriends but who knows eventually I'll find one that doesn't result in bodily harm...I hope anyway?! Oh well at least I'm having the time of my life finding all the bad ones! Oh and seriously p.s. good girls need not apply, apparently I don't find it attractive when I can walk all over you and you don't stand up for yourself. I'm a pretty big asshole and unless you put me in check it just doesn't work. I guess I'm just a cool guy to party with...Your results:
You are The Flash The Flash 80% Iron Man 75% Superman 75% Catwoman 70% Green Lantern 70% Spider-Man 60% Supergirl 53% Hulk 45% Wonder Woman 43% Robin 40% Batman 35% Fast, athletic and flirtatious.
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Music:

Saves the Day, AFI, Pennywise, Dropkick Murphy's, Taking Back Sunday, Unwritten Law, Blink 182, Rise Against, New Found Glory, Goldfinger. I love punk, anything that gets me rocking out.

Movies:

Old School, Wedding Crashers, Zoolander, Starsky & Hutch, Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore, pretty much the same stupid movies everyone likes.

Television:

Of course there's always The Simpsons, Family Guy, Southpark oh and Futurama you'll always have a special place in my heart. I especially hate that damn Bret Michaels Rock of Love show, and now there's the new one....I can't quit watching it!!

Books:

Anything by John Steinbeck and George Orwell ie. Of Mice and Men, Tortilla Flat, Animal Farm, and 1984/ The Nam by Marc Baker, oh and Go Dogs Go which is my favorite book of all time!!

Heroes:

The Big Man Upstairs for always being there for me through the tough times.AND OF COURSE:That friend thats always willing to jump on the grenade and take one for the team, no matter what she looks like. I love you Fricknasty no matter what ditch you happen to be passed out in at this moment and hopefully not drowning in your own vomit. I still can't believe you took on that "bear" in Myrtle Beach!