~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ profile picture

~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~

I am here for Friends

About Me

..I have spent my fair share of time contemplating the universe. I have wondered about life outside of my little corner of the world. I have walked with the prestigious, and been in the company of the poor. I have seen people at the mercy of this life. I've seen some win, and I've seen some lose. I've seen some fight, and I've sen some give up. I am fairly confident but still a little unsure of myself. I am not into playing games, so if you're dealing a hand..count me out. I've been through a lot, but there's more to go through. I am strong but I have my weaknesses. -------------------------------------------------------- Life has taught me that there is no such thing as fair, but it has also taught me that with each day comes a new beginning. I have not always walked a straight path, but what kind of legacy would I leave, if my life was simple and there were no complications? Who would want to tell my story if the details were all insignificant and mundane? Life has taken me far beyond my 21 years, but I have managed to escape with only a few scars. I am a grown woman with responsibilities, but I know how to be young, and experience life through the eyes of a child. ------------------------------------------------------- I've spoken many cliches but still managed to be original. I am like no one you have ever met. I am not a carbon copy of what this society thinks is acceptable. I live my life in my own way. I deal with problems as I see fit. I listen to music that is pleasing to my ears. Sometimes it's rock, sometimes it's country, and sometimes it's pop. There is a song for every feeling that I have. Music is the window to my soul. I often open my soul to the world through writing. Sometimes I just happen to put piano music to my soul and sing along. Yes, I am a woman of many talents. ------------------------------------------------------- Family is important. I have a large one that includes 1 brother, 1 half-brother, 2 step-brothers, and 1 step sister. I have a dad, a step-dad, a mom, and a step-mom. I haven't always embraced my family, but I learned through experience, that it is beautiful to have people who are always there for you. ------------------------------------------------------ I have friends. Some close, some not so close, some just simple acquaintances. There are three in particular who consume my heart. They are the ones that have stuck by my side through the things that have tested me. my life wouldn't be the same without them. They make me realize that the best things in life aren't things, but they are friends. They are three of the most important people in my life. -------------------------------------------------------- Love is a decision. It is not butterflies or anxiety. It is a simple choice that one must make in order to give their heart to another. Feelings fade, and all that's left is your decision to stick with it. In other words, can you love another when the bills are bigger than the paychecks? Are you ready to love someone even when their hair has turned gray, their teeth are no longer their own, their stomach is sagging to their knees, and they can no longer walk beside you? Are you selfless enough to put away your own feelings, and stick through "better or worse?" I have given my heart to another and made the CHOICE to love. I have often wonder if everything I sacrificed for this choice was worth it, but I have managed to love another selflessly with all my heart, and for me...that is enough. ----------------------------------------------------- I have learned though experiences, both bitter and beautiful, that it is very important to know who you are. I've searched long and hard, and have figured out who I am. If you don't know who you are, you can never truly understand people. You must know, accept, and love who you are. If you can't love yourself, you can't love another. There are things in my life and who I am that I wish I could change, but that would change me completely. And there are things about me that I do like. So I've learned to take the good with the bad. -------------------------------------------------------- Lastly, and most importantly, God is my everything. I haven't always been on the right path when it comes to my relationship with him. But I am working on it. That's the beauty of being a Christian, I am not perfect, just forgiven. I do feel bad for proclaiming to be a Christian, but living my life stradling the fence. However; I have recently taken the plunge into God with all my heart. I have decided to follow him with everything, and all I desire is him. I am a woman after his heart alone.------------------------------------So, this is who I am. I can be serious but funny, deep but occasionally shallow, depressed but happy, and so much more. There is more than one dimension to a person. It's all about the balance. I do not mind being honest, and I do not mind being myself. And if you feel that you can accept that, and accept me for me, welcome to my world. It is a disaster, but it's a ~*~beautiful disaster~*~.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~
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My Interests

All kinds of interests..., shopping, music, hangin with friends...... news.. I am not always current and up to date on my news, but I am always interested!!! I love my family. My nieces are the heart of my world. I love anything outdoors, where I can take in the world. I have spent too long being depressed and hanging out inside of my own life. It's nice to join the world. I go to church and I follow God with all my heart. I play the piano, and I can sing..so that is like therapy for me.......I collect anything with butterflies on it..I like to dance........watch movies, hang out with my family. After all I've been through and all I have done to my family, they still support me and I have learned that Family is one of the most important things in my life.

I'd like to meet:

My half brother that I have never met.

Music:

..I like all kinds of music, depending on my mood. Music always finds a direct channel to your heart. There's angry music, happy music, sad music, lovey dovey music...you name it, it's out there. There is always something for someone. I can find a reason to listen to any type of music anytime.

Movies:

..Ok, I could list forever here.....I am a sappy love story kind of girl. The last movie I watched that made me cry? --- The Notebook!! I cry every time I see Titanic even though..I've seen it like 4 million times and it is so out of date. Favorite love story of all time..Pearl Harbor!! I also like other kind of movies. I ROBOT, Spiderman, you name it. I like some scary movies!! But not many...i am a fraidy cat!!! I also like classics like Pretty in Pink, 16 Candles, Scarlett, Gone with the Wind. Oh..and one can never forget Dirty Dancing...there are so many!!!-- I am always open to watching different kinds of movies. My roomate has recently introduced me to some movies that I would not normally watch...Donnie Darko, Da Vinci Code, Fight Club( SO yeah...I'm opening up to the idea of different types of films.

Books:


Heroes:

..Jesus...he died for a world full of people he had never even met. Even before my ancestors were ever thought of....he died for me.

My Blog

Forgive me Father for I have sinned

I've done a lot of stupid things in my life. I am not perfect. I still mess up. I still slip, I still fall, and I am not worthy or deserving of anything that God has given me. Some things, I continue ...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Tue, 22 Apr 2008 03:41:00 PST

My reasons

You’re the reason, I can’t stop dreaming And you’re the reason life has meaning You’re the one who makes my life worth while And you’re the one who makes me smile You&rsq...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Wed, 19 Mar 2008 06:55:00 PST

Fighting the Inevitable

So, in case you haven't figured out, I'm in Jacksonville this week on business. And I am discovering that I have to be strong in fighting the inevitable. Obviously, I am alone over here and there real...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Thu, 06 Mar 2008 04:45:00 PST

~(*)~RIP BRANDY COX~(*)~

Before anyone goes and get's upset. I didn't know Brandy all that well, but I did have classes with her, and I did witness part of her life, so for her family and friends, I pay my respects. From what...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Sun, 24 Feb 2008 05:17:00 PST

God is FAITHFUL!!!!!

I still find it hard to believe that God finds me worthy of the blessings he is pouring into my life. It's a beautiful thing when you find that place in God where there is no sorrow because he is your...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Fri, 22 Feb 2008 05:51:00 PST

Happy Valentines Day !!!!!

I thought that this was going to be a hard Valentine's Day for me all things considered. But I've come to realize that with God, I'm experiencing the ultimate love story. And that is all I need. &nbs...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Thu, 14 Feb 2008 04:54:00 PST

I never thought it existed

I never thought that the perfect night existed until tonight. It was beautiful.   Michelle
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Mon, 24 Dec 2007 09:41:00 PST

Updates on my life

Got a new job. Started on Monday. Love it.....I mean truly love it. Ready for Christmas...I love my family and friends. Going out tonight to Suwannee lights with someone special (:)) Can't wait for th...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Sat, 22 Dec 2007 11:53:00 PST

My new job

Everyone please keep me in your prayers.  I  am waiting  to here  back on a new job. I had my interview  today, and I  think the interview went well.  So  ...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Thu, 06 Dec 2007 01:09:00 PST

Love in the time of Flutterbies

Sarah met him one day in August, not too long after his birthday. It was still warm out, but fall was just around the corner. It's a beautiful time of year. It's the time when it is still warm enough ...
Posted by ~*~Beautiful Disaster~*~ on Sun, 02 Dec 2007 10:23:00 PST