About Me
"He well knows what snares are spread about his path, from personal animosity…and possibly from popular delusion. But he has put to hazard his ease, his security, his interest, his power, even his…popularity…He is traduced and abused for his supposed motives. He will remember that obloquy is a necessary ingredient in the composition of all true glory: he will remember…that calumny and abuse are essential parts of triumph…He may live long, he may do much. But there is the summit. He never can exceed what he does this day."-Edmund Burke, December 1, 1783.
I don’t look both ways when I cross the road. I just go. I tell stories because I have them to tell, not because I am any good at making them up. I am an idealist, a romantic and a fool. I am a sheepherder in wolves clothing, a hedonist, an ascetic, a spiritualist, a bastard and a saint. I don’t aim for the stars but revel at what the sky imposes on those of us still living down here on the ground. I am a father, a son, and a brother. I am a lover, a loser and a loner. I live for the moments when light trumps darkness, when silence captures the ear more than a loud noise and your eyes are forced to shut in order to see the things right in front of you. I am a writer. I am a rubix cube. I am a joker. I am a king. I am a spade calling his self a spade. I am a loyalist. I am a literalist. I am a lover of truth and a hater of lies. I believe that hard work is the fuel of the soul, and the one thing that can save us from ourselves is ourselves. I believe in second chances, kind words that serve as remedy to scornful ones, pleasant glances that speak more than any term of endearment ever could and laughter that cures sickness. I believe family is the latticework above a secret garden that only time will allow to interact and grow. I work with my hands, think with my heart, investigate with my mind and make judgments by the way the air feels around me when I move. Though I am often wrong and seldom right, that doesn’t stop me from living free of dogmatism, being elusive of societal expectations, or freeing myself of conformity. I was once an altar boy that said “fuck you†under my breath each time the priest yelled at me for being late to mass. I was raised a catholic, turned a Buddhist, an atheist and an agnostic, and am now simply a human who believes in an order of existence and a spirit above us with which we must show respect. It’s hard for me to admit some things. I am sometimes hopeless, I have seen my brain on drugs, and I have drunk irresponsibly. I have failed tests and passed tests, I have read books and burned books, I have broken hearts and had mine broken. I’ve had several girlfriends, a handful of lovers and a rare soul mate. I believe passion is what happens when all the senses are engulfed in warmth, unable to stop consumption of the things around them that they desire. I once rode on a bus that ran over a homeless man in broad daylight because we were all in a hurry to get where we were going. I have been robbed, I have been backstabbed, I have been betrayed and I have been beaten. I no longer hurry. I realize the distance from A to B is the same as B to A, so it doesn’t matter where you start or where you begin. I grin when someone trips or slips on a banana peel, I feel guilty only when the person sees me laughing. I am not like the other guy. I am the other guy. The other guy who doesn’t need to tell you he likes fast cars, porn and exotic beers to be masculine. The other guy who has a few gray hairs here and there in his young age, an old soul in a young body, a rusted alloy in a new machine. I am who I am, not whatever you say I am. And this is me.
