Okay... fine.
I'm not a very negative person, but I have a very low tolerance for stupidity and willful ignorance. Which isn't to say I don't have a fondness and predilection for dumbassedness. I thrive off that shit. Still, said lack of patience makes dealing with many people (teenagers, religious fanatics, Texans, etc) a serious chore. Thank the gods I am not your kid's English teacher.
Many people call me an intellectual (I wouldn't go that far, but I certainly am not stupid), but I readily admit to being a dork and a dumbass. And a nerd. I look at maps and flip through dictionaries in my spare time. I am a fucking nerd.
I'm not very concerned with making myself the center of anyone's attention, so I don't often go out of my way to get noticed. I normally keep to myself, and speak only when spoken to. When with the right people, though, I can be a very loud, goofy (and obnoxious) motherfucker.
I am a freelance writer and photographer. If you want photos taken of you, your band, or your harem, contact me so we can work something out. My normal asking price is $20,000 and a Turkish prostitute, but we can negociate something if you have trouble finding an Anatolian hottie. Arrangements for documentary films, press kits, and biographies can also be made.
I like women, metal, books, guitars, cameras, coffee, and beer.
