teddy go boom. [STC]

It’s time for me to speak up. I miss them terribly. & it’s not even just them. I’ve been feeling at odds with everything for quite a while now, and everything that comes into my life lately impacts me so deeply. I’m not used to writing this sort of thing, so I’m just going to be the artist I am, and put all my thoughts out. Most of my problems started after my parents went through their ups and downs. Manipulating my parents became my favorite pass time, and a lot of damage still needs to be repaired for that, even today. I conned my parents into believing that I needed to change schools, for my own benefit. I don’t know why I do half of the things I do. I honestly, think there is something wrong with me. I’m really depressed as I’m writing this. None of my family lives anywhere remotely close to where I do, and when I see them it’s better than gold to me. If you haven’t figured I just saw my family. My two favorite cousins, and my wonderful aunt. A lot of things went on while my cousins and I were together. Emotional attachment doesn’t even come close to what I developed over the last few weeks for my cousins. I will add that I am not extremely proud of everything that I endured in, during the short time I was with them. However, everything happens for a reason, and I don’t regret one moment of it. I also realized not to trust anyone. I have trust issues with one of my best friends, my cousin Ashley, at the moment. I love her with all my heart, but I don’t know where her head is half the time. She deliberately tried to hurt me this time, and she accomplished it. As I’m writing this, I feel like I’ve lost so many things. I want to regain them again, soon. My attachment to Coco, reached its extreme this time while he was out here. Our bonding took on a whole different level, and I miss him so much. My younger cousin Nicky, keeps my smiling each and every moment I am with him. Even though he’s a little younger than me, I can’t live without him. And then there is Ashley, who most of my close friends know and adore, who just betrayed me so badly. I thought I could trust her, but I guess the damage is done, and I have to look forward. You know what I think the worst part about all of this is? I don’t know if they even realize just how much I love and care for them. A lot of things need to be cleared up, and I need some time. I just feel so lost right now. i apologize ahead of time if i cry infront of you.

coedickaly.

glamfuck. best friend (adj.):
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