Amoebas

a·moe·bas n. pl.The dictionary defines and amoeba as: 1. any of various one-celled aquatic or parasitic protozoans of the genus Amoeba or related genera, having no definite form and consisting of a mass of protoplasm containing one or more nuclei surrounded by a flexible outer membrane. It moves by means of pseudopods. Unfortunately for Webster, Amoebas truly have a different meaning. Two to be percise.
1. a large, constantly expanding group of friends, initially derived from an engulfing group of 6 girls, whom people immediately fall in love with.
2. our life.Let's start the story from the beginning. The scene is set on a cloudy September day... Once upon a Pop Warner night, three beautiful cheerleaders were caught in a down pour. As their thin, white cotton t-shirts slowly absorbed the rain, a colorful array of bras became exposed. “Shimmy shimmy shimmy,” they proclaimed, ”am I cold yet?” From that moment on, the world would never be the same. The girls who once despised each other in middle school became friends. Rachael, Tonya and Meghan would group together to form the roots of the amoeba family tree. The following year, cheerleading camp opened up the doors of friendship for the girls. Jenni and Amy although a year younger joined the others in what would later become the largest co-ed clique in Guilderland history. Not long after did God send down one of his angels- Patty D’agostino- to bring joy and peace. Patty would end up compeleting the group of best friends. These six young ladies set out on a mission. After many groups- KeRMiT, DL's, HDHA, 7 Dwarfs, JAKe TRuMP, and so on- the girls decided that a new, and final group should be established. The events of the next months would cause a spark to ignite in the mind of Miss Amelia Nagy. "Amoebas," Amy thought outloud. "We engulf everyone around us." Now let's pick up the story from where we met one Amoeba, many moons ago. God completed his mission without sending down Adam Magnan. Adam, formally a slightly overweight individual, would undergo metamorphosis while with his new friends. Soon enough, he was sharing the word of Christ while obtaining the title of Grand Uno Champion. Adam sat behind Jenni in advisory. We thought that the two '07 hotties should be together, but in reality he was too busy creating beautiful music with his band mates Mat and Chris. Mat, the guitarist from Moving to Orange, tried to woo women but unfortunately his AIDS-like qualities created some difficulties. Despite, the young Amy Nagy could not resist his angelic charm. The lead singer- and heart throb- of MTO, Chris Duffy, became an obsession to one of the original amoeba women. It soon became a possibility that half of our friends may only hang out with us to be with Chris Duffy. Vosburgh was not only home to Chris but also the infamous Russel Qulia. Russ stepped into the picture our Junior year- Sophomore year for all of you listening. Little did we know, the young boy who sold candy out of his backpack was truly a sexist, racist, wilderness man with a huge heart. Russ wasn’t the only softy football player that joined the usual crew. The huge and intimidating Kyle Hussey was first spotted in Rachael's physiology class. Rachael noticed this gentle giant while he was playing with a toddler, acting almost fatherly to the young boy. As we watched Kyle pummel members of competing football teams, a certain cripple caught Tonya's eye. Number 60- a strong, long haired teddy bear became her secret obsession. After weeks of stalking and the help of Russ, Tonya and Matt developed a beautiful- yet slightly annoying- relationship. As there love blossomed, the locker they shared with Kyle and the rest of the Junior class, soon became the official hang out spot. The sexy Puerto Rican, Christian Cortes, added some spice to the locker area with not only his appearance, but his Covert-Ops t-shirt sales and his bubbly attitude. Christian was often spotted with Rasta Joe Kos, our Rastafarian snowboarding friend who spends most of his time at Subway making delicious, free sandwiches for his friends to enjoy. Subway employed a number of our friends, including the cutest boy at school, Ryan Munzert, whose adorable smile was hard to resist. It brought several others to the lunch table each B/D day. The lunch table steadily grew throughout the year. Many classic sketch balls- for example Jeff Tybur- were seen spending time with this random group of kids. Jeff, although known for his outrageous and scandalous parties, showed us his humorous and fun loving side- not to mention his angry drunk side. Jimmy Meddelton is often seen sitting by Jeff at the table when he is not visiting the local Sunoco. Another classic member of our cult is the intruiging Leland Ross Murphy. Lee could always brighten anyone’s day by taking off his clothes or putting on Rachael’s- with Jeff. Lee likes to live dangerously by sneaking out and getting in trouble. He was missed this summer and we will miss him this year. Lee has participated in many bands with his good friend Mike Griggs. Griggsly bear, who is obsessed with his beautiful girlfriend Olga, likes to keep everyone happy and his car clean- even though Ryan Zelinski trashed it earlier this summer. Ryan himself enjoys partying in the day time and trying to keep his buddy Kyle Klapp clothed. Speaking of parties, Chris Diakiwski knows how to have a good time- whether it's riding his bike or face planting into Glock's pool. You can always find the coolest cats partying in Chris’s backyard woods, like Johnny P., Dave Cerutti, Selman Ipek and Greg Murphy. These parties hold some classic times and sweet dance parties. But the best dance parties are always done by Dustin. The sweet rave at Rachael’s graduation party was priceless. Dimitry is another kid that knows how to party- although in a rather dangerous and illegal way. He has a way of making girls go weak at the knees when he speaks his native language- Russian. Another seducing bilingual friend is Brendan Mahoney. His brain is full of so much information but his heart is just as full with care for others. Brendan is usually accompanied by his usual hoodlum friends- Kenny, Frank and Greg. These outdoors men love to set fields on fire and kill things, but they will always lend a helping hand- especially when it comes to getting hooks out of fish. Casey Fitzpatrick, Claire Leonard and Megan Flynn have always been apart of this amazing group. These girls make it so it isn’t always a sausage fest. Other people that have helped out with that are Rebe, Megan Davis and Kristen Swider. These young girls will hopefully continue to engulf more amoebas. As we leave you all to continue our lives, we hope that you will consider continuing the amoeba tradition. Make friends that are a year younger and follow your heart- even if it means dating a younger man and becoming a petophile. (Rachaels Goodbye) Thank you all for falling in love with me but my time is through. You will all be missed especially Amy and Jenni. Amy you have been like a sister to me we’ve known each other forever! Even though all we do is talk about how we hate everything we still manage to like each other. I will probably miss you more than anyone. I know you will be the one everyone calls for plans next year so good luck and I love you! (Tonyas Goodbye)Jenni- I know you think I’m often mean to you, but the truth is that I only have tried to help you out and look out for you. I hope you don’t really hate me like you say you do everyday when I wake up. I will miss you as my roommate, although you never cleaned, snored and hated my beloved child, Jackie. Please be nice to my baby- I am regrettably leaving her in your hands… And for the rest of you, we love you. Keep the Amoebas alive forever!!!Contact us at our e mail [email protected]
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