Malcriada

WRITTEN BY ANGELICA (MY BESTFRIEND AND SISTER FROM ANOTHER MISTER)A year ago today katherine smith and i were at a baseball game. the past few days had been filled with friends and alcohol- some of katherine's favourite things. as the weekend wound down i found myself thinking, and praying i wasn't right, that these would be the best days of my life. drinking with my best friend, my sister from another mister, the only perfect person in the world. having another ''moment'' in kevin's bar talking about my brother- it was then i knew that nothing could ever come between us. katherine smith could do no wrong. even outside underneath a van, lips blue from cold and shaking, she had an air about her. tragically, she always seemed to think too much, to deconstruct the environment around her and maybe this is why i loved her. she would go through every moment of her life with utmost grace. from one moment to the next she carried herself in a way i envied. from under a car to inside one in the yankee stadium parking lot, she took everything in stride. she taught me how to live in the moment.i never felt needed or depended on with kathy, she was too strong for that. even in her worst moments she figured everything out for herself, picked apart the pieces and put her own life back together. she was haunted. but her independence allowed me to be myself, i felt i never had to suppress anything for her sake, kathy handled me like a prince.i met her over 2 years ago in february. admittedly, i didn't take to her right away. it was only when we began going out together that i began to see her as a friend, a partner in crime. she stood by me through every single stupid moment, through every single drink that came back up. we made our own moments..."how'saboutyougirlscomeupforamanageatrois?" "i swear billy, i don't remember you.''it was waiting for the G train late one night that i came to realise i was falling in love. kathy was explaining men's relationships with their mothers to me. i realised in that moment that kathy was everything i wanted in life. she was a big sister, a completely non judgmental friend and a confidant with common interests.from that point on, katherine smith was my best friend. every singled marked experience she took part in. i lived with her in my heart, in my head and on my shoulders.this isn't a eulogy for katherine smith, the person is still alive today, hopefully doing well. this is a eulogy for my best friend. someone who stood by me through the worst moments, someone who smiled with me through the best moments. someone who could drink with the best of them and still (once in awhile) fall asleep in the bathroom of crobar. someone who could tear up a dance floor but started out doing the running man. someone who loved perfectly and still made mistakes. i hope she's still out there...