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Clarky

About Me

My name is Clarky. I work to pay rent, with limited success. I live above a bra shop in South East London which caters for the larger lady. When I'm not in London, my home is Barnsley, which is like London only colder, smaller and racist-er. There are many things I enjoy doing: listening to music, watching tv comedy, reading, playing guitar, drinking tea, baking and eating. For the record, I don't bake very often. My sole past-time of any creative value is my (sadly defunct) band, Dr Stanley (www.dr-stanley.tk). One day, pop pickers, the Stanley will return. Like Dr Who. Hopefully with daleks.

My Blog

December With Clarky

Here's a short update on the world of Clarky as we approach the festive season. As a money saving measure I have been living on mostly porridge for the last fortnight, with the occassional slice of br...
Posted by on Fri, 08 Dec 2006 09:22:00 GMT

The 2nd Annual PGS Reunion

So I have no idea who actually bothers to read my blog, so as such I have no idea how effective an advertisement this is, but anyway... If you didn't go to Penistone Grammar School, I might as well wa...
Posted by on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 07:29:00 GMT

Clarky Vs Alcohol: Alcohol wins.

Hello readers, I have nothing of interest to report whatsoever. I write this blog for one reason, and one reason only... I'm really, really pissed. It's only 13 minutes past 7 (according to the ...
Posted by on Wed, 15 Nov 2006 11:12:00 GMT

Tough Decision

Today, for reasons that I can't explain, I had a thought which could well change my life. It is, I believe, common knowledge that despite the fact my name is Alex Clarke (with an 'e') I spell my nickn...
Posted by on Tue, 31 Oct 2006 06:19:00 GMT

Clarky: Still homeless?

Avid readers of my sporadic blogs and bulletins will be aware that since returning to university I have been sleeping in a garage while I looked for a flat.There have been a number of developments sin...
Posted by on Sat, 28 Oct 2006 01:00:00 GMT

Clarky's orientation

As an experiment into the human psyche, I set my sexual orientation to 'not sure' when I signed up last summer. I was wondering how long it would be until it was mentioned, or if people would just ass...
Posted by on Sat, 16 Sep 2006 13:42:00 GMT

Clarky's Foolish Purchase .37

Today I bought a Jew's Harp (which in these days of political correctness has been renamed a Jaw harp). I have since realised that all it does is go 'TWANG', and that ultimately there's not a lot you ...
Posted by on Tue, 05 Sep 2006 17:25:00 GMT

JB vs Clarky, JB wins

This may seem sadistic, but here is JB's response to the crappy survey bulletin I sent out. I want Clarky. Clarky needs me. I want to insult Clarky. Clarky can fuck off, the fat cunt. Someday Clarky w...
Posted by on Sat, 05 Aug 2006 12:58:00 GMT

Clarky's web-gimp-conspiracy-theory of the week

Here's something for you to try. Open Notepad, and type 'bush hid the facts'. Save it and close Notepad. Then navigate to where you saved the file and open it. The results are a wee bit odd. Obviousl...
Posted by on Sun, 02 Jul 2006 06:01:00 GMT

Clarky's Experiment

As a fan of the creamy beverage that is Guiness, I was browsing some fan sites (!) the other day and came across http://theguinessdiet.blogspot.com . As a result, I have come to a decision: I am going...
Posted by on Sat, 20 May 2006 15:20:00 GMT