Manale

I had a dream last night I was a spy for the Canadian government. I was a double agent for the Germans, too. Of course, there was still some big alternate reality/underground Nazi government in my dream, because who makes a better villain than Nazis? But I received orders from Wilson, who was also a Canadian double agent, that I had to be at The Sorbonne in Paris in 30 minutes. He dropped off a drawing at my place --after rudely waking me up by just walking in my room and turning on my light. Apparently I had to recover "Le Main" for the Germans. This translates to mean "The Hand" en français. But I saw a little drawing of it --and it looked like a junky Christmas ornament made of stained glass or something. Wilson's instructions were to go to an intersection called "Bouille" or something like that. He said I'll find Le Main there--and I'm supposed to bring it directly to ADOLF HITLER himself--turns out he's OLD, but alive--and secretly leading an underground secret branch of the German government.But after Wilson leaves in a rush-- saying he'll meet me in Europe soon.... I realize-- that he said I have to be at that location in THIRTY MINUTES. What the fuck. I still need a shower. So I just put on my cool spy-guy suit all stinky and unshaven with big hair and hail a cab to get to the airport. By now I have like 6 minutes to get to Paris--and I havent even got to the airport yet. I finally get there and decide I'd better buy a ticket on the Concorde,,--even though it's really expensive. I'm already like, an hour late now.I think this is a set-up to make me look bad so they can fire me. I don't think that Hitler ever liked me. Then I start wondering about tit. Not tit. That's a typo.But sometimes I wonder about that, too.I'm only a man.I start thinking--"they don't FIRE secret agents. They just get rid of them".So now I'm determined to find this stupid ornament and get it to Hitler as fast as I can.-That'll impress the hell outta him--and make him look like a fool for trying to show that I'm incompetent.But how the hell am I gonna FIND this thing once I get to Paris? Is it on a street lamp? Is this thing in somebody's house? In a storehouse? Garage? Maybe it's hanging from somebody's car mirror. Of course--I've forgotten to notify the government HERE of my mission--the whole point of being a double agent is to tell them this stuff. Oh well--I'm already on the plane. I'll try and find a phone or something when I get there. I land at Orly and then take a Limo to The Sorbonne--it's like 3 in the morning there. I'm walking and it's all dewy out and really cold. I can see my breath. I walk along the campus and see an intersection of two paths -at the intersection is the sign "Le Bouille". I'm only about 4 hours behind schedule, I think. I just need to find that thing. Le Main.I notice a candle light in the basement of one of the buildings. then it goes out and i hear a window smash. I run over to the side of the building and see a guy with Le Main in his hand. I've been beat to it!But that guy--he looked like Wilson?Then the phone rang and woke me up. Damn. .............................................Other interests besides weird dreams:Antoine Walker on any team, The Celtics, and the rest of The National Basketball Association, Jackassery, Any goddamn thing that Jack Kirby ever did, Knuckles, Sangwiches (sic), going to countries I don't live in, pretending to be smart, Sneaky Dee's, Alpha Flight, The Toronto Island Ferry, Bob Burden stories, pretending I can sing, and drawing on napkins, matchbooks, and placemats while waiting for my food.I have absolutely no other interests.