I speak thirteen separate languages and over twenty-one dialects of Chinese, four of which were devised, and popularized, by me. I've single-handedly defended entire villages against advancing Mongols. I have seduced several women with my mechanically flawless body. The fictional 'Jack Bauer' character was largely based on me, with exception to the age. I am considered a national hero in Spain, Greenland, and Kazakhstan. Occasionally I will sprint a marathon just because the mood strikes me. In the summertime, I bottle my sweat and sell it to several big-name cologne manufacturers. When I get bored and want to go somewhere I hop on one of my three personal jets. I've toured South America and the majority of Europe on a unicycle.I edited my profile at Doobix.com
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