HSRM The Right Sinistroversus Booszhius Tzar Beast

My name might be Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nrnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shnedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.I'm a big guy with lots of hair on my head and people like to ask me if I know that I look like Hagrid from the Harry Potter Movies. I suppose it doesn't help that I wear a beat-up yet comfortable brown outback trench coat or that I have a deep booming voice. Whispering can be difficult for me, as sounds in the lower registers tend to travel. I would like to take a crack at voice over work, maybe for a video game or animated film. People are forever telling me I have a great voice, and I suppose it would help if I had the opportunity to use it. I guess I have a great face for radio.
The Survey I Found On MySpace
Name: John
Birthday: November 11
Birthplace: Worcester
Current Location: North Brookfield
Eye Color: Hazel-brown-yellow-weird
Hair Color: Dark Brown on my skull, dark brown and blond in my beard (it's all natural)
Height: Six Feet and a Hand
Right Handed or Left Handed: Sinistrorsum
Your Heritage: Italian, Alsacean. There are Brazilian and Japanese people with my last name though.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Black Steel-Toe Boots
Your Weakness: Food.
Your Fears: Having my throat slit.
Your Perfect Pizza: Anything. Blue whale and spotted owl, anyone?
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Get into a shape I like.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "..."
Thoughts First Waking Up: I wish that dream was real.
Your Best Physical Feature: My vocal cords.
Your Bedtime: usually around eleven o'clock post meridian.
Your Most Missed Memory: Trick interrogation? I'm guessing you meant I wish I could re-live it, so I would have to say the time my face was chewed on and mutilated by Caesar the dog. It's a unique thing that will never happen again.
Pepsi or Coke: Usually Diet Coke. I miss OK soda. However, Deit Pepsi is good too. I also drink a good deal of Diet Polar flavors, too.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Firstly, it's McDonald's (or McZargald's) and secondly, they both serve tasty slow deaths.
Single or Group Dates: Either, I guess. As long as at the end of the night the two couples go our seperate ways. You pervert.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Neither. Lemonade.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate. With Tabasco.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee. With Tabasco.
Do you Smoke: Only when someone sets me alight.
Do you Swear: Swear? As by a holy book? No. Curse? Yes, far too often, I'm afraid.
Do you Sing: Yes. Second Bass.
Do you Shower Daily: I remain clean.
Have you Been in Love: Still am.
Do you want to go to College: Been there. Might do it again, given the chance.
Do you want to get Married: I am now and shall remain so.
Do you belive in yourself: I believe that I am extremely imperfect and that I am capable of unspeakable evils, but have been given the means to cast the demons aside and strive to do so daily.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Yes. In a car, if I am reading and my peripheral vision picks up the scenery passing by, I get the queasy bad thing.
Do you think you are Attractive: In a couple ways, I suppose I am.
Are you a Health Freak: Nope.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Love them. Ride the lightning.
Do you play an Instrument: No, but I want to learn to play the Theremin.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes. It was tasty.
In the past month have you Smoked: No.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: I almost sat on a pill bottle in my coat pocket.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Not as such.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: No.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: I never have.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Yes.
In the past month have you been Dumped: No.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I never have.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Probably someone's heart as I walked through Wal-Mart.
Ever been Drunk: Once. I drank three quarters of a liter of Southern Comfort. I could still walk, but when I made it home, my dinner of baked ziti and meatballs returned with a vengance. No hangover the next morning
Ever been called a Tease: no.
Ever been Beaten up: Yes.
Ever Shoplifted: Yes.
How do you want to Die: I would rather go without pain, because I've had enough already. I do not think I will die, though.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: A father a son or daughter could be proud of.
What country would you most like to Visit: The European Continent. Japan as well. I would be a giant over there. Sometimes it is fun to stand out, and that would be one of the times.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Something complimentary
Favourite Hair Color: Dark
Short or Long Hair: Long
Height: Shorter than me
Weight: Human
Best Clothing Style: My own.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Drugs as in the recreational kind? Zero.
Number of CDs I own: Several hundred.
Number of Piercings: Zero.
Number of Tattoos: Zero.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Everything I did wrong.