Fuck hamsters |
It's taken a couple of days to set in completely. Who would've thought that the hamsters would take over. It's been rough. Living in a big glass aquarium. All day the hamsters tap the glass and hope I... Posted by on Mon, 10 Jan 2005 07:39:00 GMT |
splurt |
I am feeling so feeble... Digidigi poo digi poo. My oh my wanka wanka wanka splurt. Posted by on Wed, 05 Jan 2005 23:49:00 GMT |
walking the plank |
So I left Salt Lake and decided to reveal myself to the Arabs as Gabriel. That didn't go so well. They weren't so easily fooled as the Mormons. They thought I was an American and half of them hid whil... Posted by on Sun, 02 Jan 2005 09:22:00 GMT |
Temple Square New Year's Day |
After we all had soup, the boys passed out and I turned the ship around. I decided to visit Salt Lake. There was a big reception for me. They don't get many UFO's there. I landed in Temple Square and ... Posted by on Sat, 01 Jan 2005 15:41:00 GMT |
soup |
I tried my best to drink these naked frat boys under. They were pretty tore up when they picked me up with their flying saucer so I figured I had a pretty good shot. Things were going pretty good. Eve... Posted by on Wed, 29 Dec 2004 08:19:00 GMT |
flying sausage |
When I woke this morning my ass was sore too. This cant be healthy. Ive been hard for three days straight and Lord knows whats in those goddamn Mickeys theyre giving me. Im sick of these perverte... Posted by on Tue, 28 Dec 2004 00:35:00 GMT |
Monday Monday |
I am so sore.... I fell on my knees and prayed to Satan and I was put on hold for four hours. Fucking Monday.... Finally I get a hold of one of his minions but he tells me my problems are too big for ... Posted by on Mon, 27 Dec 2004 04:09:00 GMT |
Lord Save Me |
I'm getting really depressed. These ex-virgins from Hell that Santa sent me to get even after I blackmailed him have made life miserable. I have started praying to Jesus. Jesus came down and I told hi... Posted by on Sun, 26 Dec 2004 13:02:00 GMT |
help |
The thirteen ex-virgins dragged me to some compound in southern Utah. Outside my tiny window I can see a dump full of televisions and satellite dishes. I can only assume that I'm near Colorado City. T... Posted by on Sun, 26 Dec 2004 11:39:00 GMT |
merry fucking xmas |
Welll I got what I asked for from Santa. The bastard owed me for keeping quiet about that elf thing he had going. It's lonely on the North Pole.
So, anyways, I got those thirteen virgins I needed to ... Posted by on Sat, 25 Dec 2004 11:32:00 GMT |