CLiCK "BUY IT NOW" ON tHE LEFT SIDE OF THE SCREEN TO PuRCHASE SO HEAVY FOR SOMETHING SO EMPTY ToDAY!
UNCLE JEMIMA IS aLL THaT IS MAN. HE EaTS LARGE QUANTiTIES OF MeAT, LAUGHS BRUSQUeLY aT GOOD SLaPSTiCK, aND INVENTED THE CiRCLE. BUT DeSPiTE HIS LUMBeRJACK ARMSICLES AND THUNDeROUS BUNYONS, HE TENDS tO SPEND MOST oF HIS TiME WRITiNG SONGS AND PeRFORMiNG THEM FOR STRaNGERS. HE DOESN't LiKE WHERE THE TeRMS “INDIE,†“POP,†or “ALTERNATIVE†HAVE LED iN MODeRN SOCIETY, sO HE iNSTEAD STICKs TO THE TeRM “APPLICABLE.†HiS CHRONIC ILLNESS TOUR DoES NOTHiNG TO HeLP THE CHRONiCALLY ILL, IT JuST CONTiNUES WiTHOUT CLIMAX OR CoNCLUSION. HE SPiTS on GROUNDHOGS FROM CHAiRLiFTS aND HaTES THE RADIO UNLeSS IT'S PLAYiNG HIS OWN MuSIC.
WiTH THESE FACTs, MAY YOu ARM YOURSeLVES WiTH HIS BALLS OF FiRE AND FORTiFY THE WORLD AGAINsT ALL THAT IS EViL (nickelback) aND UNJUST (New Jersey tolls). WRiTE ON THE WALL. LiSTEN tO THE MUSIC. LiVE tHE DREAM.
JUST HOW iMPORTANT IS iT TO LISTeN TO UNCLE JEMIMA?
See what these folks are saying:
"Uncle Jemima's understanding of music is phenomenal. He brings color into a world full of black and white music. His songs are sweet and sad, yet filled with moments of intense fist-shaking rock."
-Alexandra Angelich, Astronomers
"One of the best indie songwriters in Charlottesville."
-Jacob Wolf, Twisted Branch Tea Bazaar
"...Not only do I wake up to Uncle Jemima, I sleep off of it, I dream about it, it provides me light in the dark, it provides me with heat when it's cold outside, it fills up my gas tank for $0.75 a gallon, and it helps me do my homework. Well done Uncle Jemima, well done."
-Benjamin James, Philosopher
"It's official... I too wake up to Uncle Jemima every morning in order to seek the meaning of life."
-Curran Chauhan, Dreamer
"...This glorious [musician called]...[Uncle Jemima is very worth your time]."
-Barack Obama, President
"Sorry... just can't bring myself to drive 45mins to see Kyle play. He's a douche."
-Kosta Popović, Asshole
