♥ Jessika ♥

--Those close to me may describe me as: :dependable
:hard-working
:driven
:fun
:blunt
:serious
:dance-a-holic
:education seeking
:loyal
:trustworthy
:passionate
:giving
:neurotic at times
:punctual
:original
:insightful
:detailed
:perfectionist
:busy
:prioritized
:happy
:soul-searching
:cultured
:blessed
Born and raised in Germany to a German father and American mother, I have evolved into quite a diverse gal! Two stints each in Germany and in Texas have allowed me to attend school in both countries and experience both cultures. I am 100% fluent in German. 1/2 of my family still reside in Germany, including my father, while the others are in the Northeastern part of the USA. It's just me out here, on my own, making my way in the Lone Star State!!!
Since my move to the DFW area in 2002, I have experienced much more than ever imaginable. I have found life-long friendships, developed my education, begun to build a career, and found love. I have suffered unimaginable tragedies along the way that have made me even stronger today. Without the support of my friends and those I hold dear, I would truly be lost!
I am working on plans to attend graduate school in 2007 with aspirations of obtaining my masters in counseling psychology. My life is extremely busy, hectic, and stressful, but at the end of the day, I am proud of where I am and all I have ahead of me to encounter! I am excited for the future because I know great things are in store!
My LoveI am amazingly blessed to have a wonderful, truly precious and selfless person to call my better half. EDWIN came into my life when I didn't think I needed him or anyone at all, for that matter. He was persistent on showing me why we could be incredible together and almost a year and half later, there's definitely no looking back. He's always there for me and helping guide me through some of my own struggles. I think we tend to work so well, because we truly are so opposite of one another. He's sees the glass half-full, I see it half-empty (well, just plain empty in some cases;)), he's the relaxed "fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants" type B personality, I am the high-strung, neurotic over-analyzer. If there's a way to disagree on something, it's pretty much a given that we will. We give each other a run for our money when it comes to an argument. I don't think a debate team would have anything on us! We do agree on one thing--we are both nerds at heart. We have spent entire Saturday afternoons configuring our home network or formatting our 4 computers. If that's not needed, we might go to Fry's just to see what we can't live without. Many nights we go to bed and play some online trivia against each other or solve science-related crossword puzzles together. Going to Barnes and Nobles to peruse through books is also another "dorky" thing we really enjoy together. We LOVE cooking together and will plan out the monstrosity of a meal we will cook on the weekend throughout the entire week. We actually get giddy about it! I think Edwin would be hard-pressed to find another girl that he can talk tech, cars and computers with. I would be hard-pressed to find another guy that could appreciate my strong personality and my independent attitude. Sometimes I don't let Edwin know that he IS needed. Eventhough I may not act like it at times, I DO need his help and I love it when he teaches me new things. It takes a special person to deal with me sometimes and he knows just the right way to always "kill me with kindness", no matter how rotten I might be. We truly share a very unique chemistry together and I couldn't ask for anything more!
My Take on Life and LivingMy individuality, my perseverance, and my esteem make me who I am. Looking back on my life and my experiences, I alternate between feelings of amazement and disbelief, both tainted with a hint of resentment. Having since “survived” times I never thought I’d make it through, I somehow have become more grateful than ever. I am grateful for the incredible amount of blessings and advantages I have been so luckily to have been given in my life. Things that I used to tend to view as disadvantages and setbacks, since have become my milestones and my motivations. It’s funny, people always say they have a need to test themselves in order to learn their limitations, thus allowing them to continue confronting challenges and beating the odds in their lives. That philosophy really never said much to me in the past. There’s always another limit and another notch higher than the last to move the bar up to. It seems that in finding my way in this unyielding, and unpredictable world, it’s all started to gel a bit more in my mind. Being able to overcome and rise above inconceivable and seemingly insurmountable challenges is what gave my life meaning. It’s what made me realize, “I have purpose here…”. Truthfully, I have no idea what that purpose is, but having the notion and the stronghold to the belief that I have yet to serve mine allows me a sense of peace and comfort. It’s amazing how much you really don’t know about yourself until on inanimate event forces it out of you. Self-Discovery, I believe might be the term for it….I’ve come to realize what it is in MY life that is important.
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that I know there’s no one in this world to depend on but myself. Now understand, not because I have been let down or disappointed one too many times by those who I relinquished my trust in, although we’ve all been there. Not because I want to sound so cliché--Simply because I know how unpredictable LIFE is. One minute your whole world is ahead of you and you’ve got every stepping stone there to help you make the journey. It only takes the blink of an eye to suddenly have your entire world thrown upside down. What happens then? Only YOU can control that. Do you deny and make excuses for shortcomings to follow, or do you begin to accept things as they are and make the best choices possible? Anyone who has ever been in that place knows life is all about choices.
Everyday we are given choices. We choose to get up or lay in bed. We choose how to approach our day, whether we will bring the previous day’s troubles with us and to those around us or if we will possess an attitude that allows us to perceive and handle our issues in a positive way. We can despair at the upsets life gives us and surrender to them, CHOOSING not to appreciate how precious life really is and to live it. We choose to “take the easy way out” or choose to work hard for what we want and want to achieve. We choose to make excuses for all the reasons we’re not where we want to be or haven’t done what it is we said we’d do. We all have the same choices when it comes down it, we just don’t all have the same journey and the same means of getting to where we want to be. We make choices about how we want those around us to treat us by choosing how to treat them. As human beings, we are wired to “expect” respect. When we don’t receive what we think we deserve, we choose how to react. We retaliate and seek vengeance or we make a change that will prevent the same type of upset again by evaluating how we choose to react to certain things. I find life has become much easier by not becoming upset and hurt at the actions of others or at the events life presents, but to understand so much in this world is out of our control. “We cannot control others’ actions, all we can control is how we react to them.” FINALLY understanding that has allowed to be content with life.