"The Middle Eastern states aren't nations, they're quarrels with borders." --PJ O'Rourke
"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead." --Woody Allen
"I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay?" --Dennis Leary
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." --Brooke Shields (during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign).
"A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials." --Ronald Knox
"I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know." --Mel Brooks (on writing his Memoirs)
"Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings." --Ed Gardner "Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian." --H.L. Mencken. "People are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it." --Noel Coward