Mike Jooooones profile picture

Mike Jooooones

Who? Mike Jooooooooones!

About Me

I'm the fastest sperm in the bunch. I can climb walls and spit on celings. I can swim faster than a speeding bird. I can teach you to dig holes. I'm looking to start a buisness teaching people to fly. I need to find a building with no floor first. I can see through windows, run into walls, and open doors with the turn of a knob. But most of all, I'm yo' baby's daddy.

My Interests

Mass displays of individuality, Individual displays of conformity, Ninjas, Hockey fights, Bacon, California, Avacados, Parsley, Harlequin Fetesus, Airbags, Random things people say, Public displays of pubics, Glass, Grass, Gas, Gus, Goo, Gob, Gam, Gub, and certianly advanced algorithims concerning areas of obtuse triangles in the fourth dimnension.

I'd like to meet:

Courting Disaster much? You know you dig it... Video code provided by Venereal Diseases.

Music:

Yes! A lot of wierd shit that you're too cool for.

Movies:

Any movie that actually shows someone taking a shit, like from the toilet bowl view, I would consider gross. Who the hell would watch that? Certainly wont catch Mike Jones watching that, alone, on a Tuesday evening, with a box of Cheez-its and a bottle of scotch. You'd definately never see that...

Television:

I like watching shows for deaf blind people. They're so much more stimulating to me.

Books:

I never really learned to read. I only made this page through a series of extremely lucky guesses.

Heroes:

Anyone that wears a cape and some sort of face mask or makeup, usually has some catchy little phrase and some initials. That's what I call a hero.

My Blog

Whereabouts of a certain Ms. Mary Jane.

Alright nutchins, Someone in the world knows where I left my pipe last night. The little blueish glass one with the asshole carb. I'm sure you've seen it, quite possibly even smoked out of it. Th...
Posted by Mike Jooooones on Sat, 04 Mar 2006 11:48:00 PST

This is a complete waste of time.

.
Posted by Mike Jooooones on Wed, 14 Sep 2005 07:42:00 PST

Hey you fucking bitches

hey shitbags. i smoked a lot of ganja today and could use a bit more. someone i know better hook it up. fuck this. im out. peace
Posted by Mike Jooooones on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST