HORRORscopes
If you were born today:
You are only an infant and can not read or comprehend this, so why would it matter what your day is going to be like?
Aries (March 21-April 19)
An ingenuous innovation and invention will impress you...of course it will also depress you because your main competitor created it
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
It is a bad sign when your ATM machine laughs at you
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
Guard against dietary indiscretions after dark; other indiscretions should be ok, however
Cancer (June 21-July 20)
Feelings of romance are in the air, which might explain why your partner is getting dressed up while you're leaving for work
Leo (July 21-Aug 22)
Wearing the same outfit to work as your boss is not considered complimentary - especially if they are of the opposite sex
Virgo (Aug 23-Sept 22)
If you had a mind, you would take it out, play with it, and lose it underneath the couch
Libra (Sept 23-Oct 22)
Socializing isn’t especially favorable after dark, but then again socializing hasn’t ever been extremely favorable for you at anytime
Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21)
Your parole card should not be your first choice when someone asks to see your ID
Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21)
Focus your attention on group activities…preferably with humans of the opposite sex this time
Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19)
Your in-laws are coming to town - RUN!
Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18)
Little things will be going wrong all week..there is no stopping it; just get drunk and accept it
Pisces (Feb 20-March 20)
The stars said something about either falling behind in your work or getting some behind while you're at work. So you're either in for a really good day or a really bad one
check blog for previous HORRORscopes
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