Many people are upset about the lack of about-me-facts I have had in my "about me" section. Because I know these obsessive people will not be able to sleep at night without knowing all about my life, here are a few things about me:The first thing you should know about me is that I was never born. I just sort of popped into existance. That's right, popped. I don't remember much about it, but there was a lot of color and I think New Kids on the Block were playing in the background. After the whole popping thing, life was pretty quiet. I spent most of my childhood living in Alaska. That's where I learned all about harpooning and kissing with my nose. I was young, and had a lot of energy. I knew Alaska wasn't enough for me, I needed to explore. First chance I got, I moved to Africa. My life was a whirlwind of jungle drums and smoke signals. It wasn't enough. I needed more adventure. I took over The Purplemonkeydishwasher, a pirate ship whose captian obviously isn't important because I defeated him. I sailed for years and years, searching for happiness, but I only ever found large sums of treasure. Darn my luck. I ended up in Japan, and that's where I ended up fighting octapi. The octapi fights shot me to fame. I grew tired of buying new clothes because of all the ink, and put octapi fighting behind me. I moved to Pennsylvania, and took on my biggest challenge yet....working in a pharmacy with crazy Ephradites. I'll let you know the details of my exciting adventures here as they develope.Catch ya on the flipside.td.columnsWidening img, td.columnsWidening object { max-width:100% !important; width: ..this.width 400 ? 400 : true); }
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