Linda

i will only frequent areas within a 4 block radius of my apartment. i own a cat who is, for some reason unbeknownst to me, completely suicidal. i will not buy clothing or shoes if there is no return policy. i collect empty boxes of junior mints and The Onion. somedays I only consume chocolate milk, cigarettes, and alcohol. i never believed in ghosts until 2 of them tried to kill me in my bed in Italy. i will clean your apartment for free. sometimes i'll charge you $30. i have a phobia of: owls, pods, clusters, the word "cluster," and willem dafoe. i will always point out exceptionally tall and exceptionally short people, against my own will. i enjoy getting vaccinations and fillings.