I am your typical English major. As in, I am someone who will not have a job after they graduate. I am well versed in useless information, and take classes, which in the words of my dearest friend Angela, are 'painstakingly boring.' My friends will no longer play Boggle or Scrabble with me because I am known to use obscure words that nobody but me, and fellow dictionary readers, would ever need to know. I get extremely defensive during play and often say things such as, "Of course I can use Aldereliefest! It was slang in Shakespearean language!"
For those of you who prefer the spark-noted version of that lengthy paragraph: I lost my mind long ago, and enjoy reading books in my spare time, along with the books assigned for my countless and trying English courses. (gasp).
My middle initial is the letter "L." It stands for "Lasser" which is a family name that has been in my family since the 11th century, according to my late grandmother. I'm pretty sure that's a lie though, just like how my great grandfather Lasser was in the party of rebels that killed the Tzar and his family in Russia at the turn of the century.
I like traveling to Europe and I like to speed on the highway, and I also like talking myself out of speeding tickets. Some people think that when I act like Woody Allen it's a routine. Perhaps it used to be, but now it just comes out when I'm nervous, when I've had too many shots of espresso, or when I'm in love.
I may be one of the most judgmental people you will ever meet, but I don't believe in labeling people. The only labels I believe in are Prada and Gucci.
