I'm a screenwriter who drove from the Bronx to the O.C. to make it happen.
Jonathan's Rules To Live By
1. How you do anything is how you do everything.
2. Whoever smelt it, dealt it.
3. Quote songs as if it were your own profound message.
4. Take your passion. Make it happen.
5. Headbands.
6. Pay more. Cry only once.
7. Guys, when jogging with a male friend, make sure you know what he's wearing beforehand to avoiding wearing the same color coordinated top.
8. When in doubt, smell it.
9. When you air-guitar in public don't leave your mouth wide-open or you'll look absurd.
10. Snapping and wiggling your head while walking is cool.
11. Whoever infumed it, kaboomed it.
12. When you see a famous moviestar say you loved them in (insert their most embarrassing movie, TV show, or news moment.)
13. Replying with "that's what she said" can make most everything funnier.
14. If she offers, take it.
15. Try to use "I'm too sexy for this (insert any word here)" on a daily basis.
16. When your parents sing a song, take that song off your I-Pod immediately.
17. Netflix
18. The key to good dancing is what you do with your shoulders. Shake them up and down to the beat for cool points. Trust me.
19. Get a dog. Chicks dig dogs.
20. Don't kiss and tell but look smug and a tad embarrassed when doing so.
21. At the gym when a hot girl walks by while you exercise, count each rep out loud "97, 98, 99..."
22. Ribs.
23. When in doubt, courtesy flush.
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