TrevorTravestyâ„¢Are you ready to step into my world?
There Are Two Sides Of Chaos--A Side Of Light And A Side Of Darkness. Good And Evil, Life And Death, Love And Hatred; Two Sides Of Conflicting Views, Trapped In A Neverending Battle For Supremacy...What Is It That Lies Between Them?
A man's life is but 50 years. It is but a dream - an illusion in the great order of things. None given life in this world can escape destruction. So my life has come to an end, but the end of everything is only the beginning of everything ~ Oda Nobunaga
I stand out on the cape, the cliff overlooking the sea. My ocarina in hand, and hope in my heart. My eyes well up with tears, and I hold my necklace with pride. Then, I start to play. The song was filled with love, passion, and hope. My necklace and the sea started to glow a bright blue, an aqua blue aura surrounding me. When the song was done, I jumped into the sea, my true form being revealed...
I'm the one who steps from the shadows, all trenchcoat and cigarette and arrogance, ready to deal with the madness. Oh, I've got it all sewn up. I can save you. If it takes the last drop of your blood, I'll drive your demons away. I'll kick them in the bollocks and spit on them when they're down and then I'll be gone back into darkness, leaving only a nod and a wink and a wisecrack. I walk my path alone... who would walk with me?
I am too lethargic and unreliable to help with this pretty little havoc humans have created. And yet, they all need me to fulfill their stupid goals and ambitions. What am I really but the one standing behind the stage and watching their every dumb move; a mediator of sorts, one may say. It takes quite a huge amount persuasion in order for me to help them. And when I do help them, things end up horrible, from every possible way one may look at it. Long story short, I am a god of some sort.
In a little while you will be alone in shoreless space, to wander its limitless solitudes without friend or comrade forever--for you will remain a thought, the only existent thought, and by your nature inextinguishable, indestructible. But I, your poor servant, have revealed you to yourself and set you free. Dream other dreams, and better!...You perceive, now, that these things are all impossible except in a dream. You perceive that they are pure and puerile insanities, the silly creations of an imagination that is not conscious of its freaks - in a word, that they are a dream, and you the maker of it. The dream-marks are all present; you should have recognized them earlier. It is true, that which I have revealed to you; there is no God, no universe, no human race, no earthly life, no heaven, no hell. It is all a dream - a grotesque and foolish dream. Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought - a vagrant thought, a useless thought, a homeless thought, wandering forlorn among the empty eternities!
Note to everyone: It isn't hard to impress me, just be yourself & we will get along just fine. That is all I ask for.
Sometimes your lies are better than the truth; Sometimes you say 'Fuck this!' and end it all with a single bullet; Do not worry, for I am here with you. I will guide you out of the darkness and into the light if you just take my hand & believe~Trevor
I'm Trevor Shawn Elia, and if you haven't heard of me, well then today is your lucky day! Don't call me Travis if you value your life, k? Or 'Trever' *shudders*. I hate having things misspelled. ESPECIALLY my name. Got it?
I'm GAY. Meaning I like guys, and I have no qualms about it. Although I will still flirt with girls & such, boys are still more my style. So get over yourselves already.
I fucking ♥ eyeliner, skinny jeans, studded belts, sexy hair, etc.. What can I say? It's a sexy look, and everyone knows it. I do my own makeup, hair, etc..but my style is my own. I don't copy anybody, because then I would be just another face in the crowd. Note: Boys that look feminine or wear eyeliner, tight jeans, etc.. I ♥ you! You already won points!
I'm too old to be called a boy, yet too young to be called a man. I'm 20, gonna be *counts fingers & toes* 21 on September 16th. That means I'll be able to buy my own booze, boys & girls! No more using fake ID's LOL But I am still young at heart, meaning I'll play hide-n-go seek at Wal-Mart because it is damn good fun, even though finding places to hide is still a bitch! I'm enjoying my youth while I can, because I've heard so many people say "Oh, I should have done this when I was young.." Don't worry, folks. I'm sure to do it for you and live the memory =] It is fun to live in the moment sometimes. I say you only live once, unless you believe in the concept of Reincarnation. So that'd mean you'd live multiple times & keep fucking up? Wow. Some people need to get it right the first time. Got it memorized?
I was born in the city of Westminster, which for you non-California residents is also known as 'Little Saigon' due to the many Vietnamese people living there. That must explain why I like Asian culture so much, huh? It's in the O.C. Yep..I'm an Orange County boy. And not your typical one, either! So don't start assuming I say 'dude' and surf & shit like that..k, dude?!
Due to contrary belief, I AM part black, although I do not look like it at all. Guess I got the good genes, huh? The rest of me is French, Irish, German, Norwegian, Danish & British. A veritable medley of races. Which means that I do not act a certain race at all. How exactly do you act like a particular race, anyways? I act like myself, because I don't like labels. Labels only hold us back, and keep us in specific roles, keeping everything in a box. I like being outside of said box. So respect me for being me!
Anyone asleep yet? Still following me here? Good! I live in the dismal hellhole of California known as Colton, which is in the 'wonderful' Inland Empire. This dump is surrounded by disgusting brown mountains, skies choked with smog & other pollutants harming this already fucked environment, and people who can't drive worth a fuck. Yep, this is my San Bernardino County. And yet, there is beauty still to be found. Like when the snow covers the mountains during the cold winters, and on clear nights you can actually see stars glimmering in the distance. Beauty is everywhere. Just open your eyes once in a while & you'll see it. Note: If anyone ever wants to hang out or get to know me, I am always ready to get the fuck outta here!
Now that we got that bit of info out of the way, let's move on to more interesting things, shall we? To some I'm crazy, loud, and obnoxious; Others know me as passionate, charming, and romantic ; Suffice to say, all of those qualities are me, yet they are only a small fraction of who I truly am. Ready to fall down the rabbit hole?
When it comes to writing or speech, I can be quite the perfectionist. Throughout the years, I have perfected my speech & writing skills greatly. Even while I was in Elementary school, I spoke & read in a college level. I take great pride in my writing skills, and I am not beside flaunting it. I love the written word & speaking intelligently, as I believe that words are very powerful & can have very profound, long lasting effects depending on what is said and in what context. Don't talk to me and type like tHiS, or THIS, thizzz..I honestly do not pay attention to ghetto talk. If you are trying to get my attention, please talk to me in a legible manner.
I don't consider myself vain or arrogant, because in my past, I wasn't the person you see before you now. I was overweight, and I was not happy with myself at all. It has taken a few years for me to get the body that I have now, and I still workout every day and put lots of hard work & dedication into it so that I may maintain my body and be comfortable with who I am.
Being a unique individual, I follow Buddhism. For me, Buddhism has helped me to discover who I am on the inside, and to help me balance myself when everything else is spinning out of control. It is a peaceful, loving, accepting religion that isn't biased nor points fingers at other religions. Which is how I am myself. Non-judgmental & passive.
Just so everybody gets it now, I have an Orochimaru complex (As if you couldn't notice? ;p) But I bet most of you are wondering, "Of all people, why HIM?!" Yes, I know that he is a ruthless killer. I know he does what he feels in his mind to be 'right' even if is at the expense of others.And yet, in all of his maniacal scheming & total disregard for human life, I find a certain beauty in him. His pale, snow white skin, those piercing eyes that gaze right into your soul (And freeze you in place ftw), and that beautiful jet-black hair. He has an elegant, relaxed way of speaking, although it is quite sarcastic. I guess I find things that are dark & deadly to be beautiful. He's also very straightforward, like myself, and rarely leaves room open for argument. As a child he had high expectations placed upon him. It's not everyday you are selected as next in line for the position of running an entire village, with everyone looking up to you as the symbol of hope. And yet Orochimaru, being the misunderstood beauty he is, threw it all away all for the sake of preserving his own immortality at the villagers expense. In my eyes he is a misunderstood genius, and in a way he reflects the other side of my persona. As Orochimaru says, "Well... I sort of have a goal. If I were to state it in words... I like to see moving things. They're boring when they don't move. A windmill that is not moving... can be nice from time to time... But most of the time, it's not even worth looking at." Sometimes the most beautiful things are the most deadly♥
My dream is to one day become a J-Rock Star. I know it is a very lofty goal, and seems impossible, ESPECIALLY for someone who isn't even Japanese, and yet I know I can attain this goal of mine. J-Rockers are so amazing. I mean, look at their sense of style, poise, elegance, and that fantabulous hair! Plus the singing is beautiful, yet has that rock soul that completes it. I sing in Japanese/English, and also write songs & lyrics in both languages, as well as French. I want to start a band called 'Harajuku Homocide', so that everyone will know my name one day and hear my music. Get ready for a new star on the horizon ♥
I LOVE video games. Mainly fighting games, because I excel amazingly at them, if I do say so myself. I own 15 of them on my PS2. But I also own a PS3 & an Xbox 360. Oh, yeah, and my grandpa is also a gamer! How cool is that? Although he plays stuff like..Halo 3 & Fallout >.> But at least I have friends who can challenge me at Street Fighter & stuff! I also welcome new people who'd like to give it a go ;]
I can be absolutely blunt at times. It's not that I am heartless or emotionless or anything like that, it's just that I have to get right to the point so that nothing feels left unsaid, if that makes sense? So if you catch me at one of my blunt times, I apologize beforehand.
Being different than everyone else is a great thing! NEVER let anyone tell you otherwise. I strive for eccentricity. I'm optimistic, pessimistic, hedonistic. You may think you know me, but you don't. I blend in with crowds and can converse on many levels. I'm very down-to-earth, 'cause I like having friends as opposed to enemies. I am a simple person, yet to many I remain a mystery.
Some kids these days seek attention by cutting themselves. You want to know my stance on that one? I don't believe we should harm ourselves just for people to notice us. Harming yourself only conjures up negative images & emotions, and people will only help out of desperation. I try to talk as many people as I can out of it, because life is something that I hold sacred. Nobody should be ignored & feel left out of what this world really has to offer. So think twice before you steal your dad's razors! Because next thing you'll see is me!
Shaolin Kung Fu & Ninjutsu have changed my life. I have trained in the martial arts for 14 years now, learning not only the self-defense aspect of it, but also the philosophy that goes along with it. It has taken me a long time to understand what my body is truly capable of, but I am still learning new things and ways to mentally & physically prepare my mind. Lots of dedication & hard work have gone into all this, and yet I have pulled through. Never give up on something you start, and always give it your full dedication & all of your heart. You can make amazing things happen if you truly believe in yourself! It is as Bruce Lee once said: "Don't think, feel. It is like a finger pointing a way to the moon. Don't concentrate on the finger, otherwise you might miss all of that heavenly glory."
I am in love with the piano. I was raised listening to the classical composers, like Beethoven, Bach, Chopin, etc..and I just love the tranquility and beauty that it brings. I taught myself to play for 10 years now, and hopefully I can make a career out of it. It brings me great joy when others hear my music, and the greatest reward is when they smile.
I'm a Japanophile, meaning I love absolutely everything about Japan. The fashion sense is amazing, the people are gorgeous, and basically everything we start liking they already liked it before. The ultimate trendsetters. The whole country is like Bizarro world. They do everything we do, just in a really strange way. It reminds me of that scene in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" where they go near Toontown, and you can see clouds of smoke and yelling and fighting and all sorts of haywire shit happening happening above the horizon to signify the complete and total lunacy of the place. Japan is just like that. The whole world continuously scratches its head at the Far East, then sits back and watches to see what wacky thing the Japanese will do next. I mean, the country is amazing once you get past all the incest and pedophilia and giant robots and all, but after that--huh? Japan is a super cool, crazy place. Je t'adore ♥.
Average is not a word that you would find in my vocabulary. To me, average is the same as typical, and I ride against the tide. What? I rhymed? Pshh... I am everything else BUT typical. I strive for uniqueness; to stand out in the crowd. One day, my name shall be emblazoned across the stars, and everyone shall know me. Believe it!
Everyone has dreams and aspirations. I have nightmares & shattered memories, but that doesn't stop me from obtaining my goals. My dream is to one day see people smile..Not one of those fake, painted on smiles, but a real smile. The kind that makes you believe in the world; The kind that makes you warm on the inside. Then, I believe, the world will know true happiness. The meaning of what it feels to be alive. Far too many of us live behind curtains, never taking center stage. There is ALWAYS time to shine. Just believe in yourself, and you can climb the highest of peaks. Remember, this is YOUR life. And it is you who holds the thread of your fate.
People often ask me: Do you drink? Do you smoke? Do you do drugs?
You wanna know my take on it all? Let's just say if I had the money, I would be drinking more often. I don't do it as much as most of these booze hounds, but once I drink we are going to have one hell of a time! If I smoke, it is a VERY rare occurrence, like having a great president in this country. And I'll occasionally smoke pot if I must, but that's pushing it. But what you do is your business. So if you like to whack off to Pamela Anderson in a gorilla suit, then by my guest. Just don't make me try to do that!
Sex. Everyone is doing it. Yep, I am too. I haven't been a virgin since I was 14. If you wanna know, I am a very sexual person. If I'm horny, it is quite obvious, let's just say. Especially since I wear skinny jeans, which by the way accentuate my curves & bulges. But that's saying too much. I'm gonna leave more to the imagination. Just thought I'd touch basis on all aspects of me. No, that doesn't make me a whore. I just enjoy enjoying physical pleasures whenever it comes up. xD! Talk about an innuendo, huh? But in all seriousness, I only sleep with the person that holds the key to my heart. They get to enjoy me entirely. You wanna see a whore? Go to downtown San Bernardino at night and you'll see a whore. Not the Julia Robert ones, either. Note: Pretty Woman was a whore's fantasy. Yes, it is true. All whores wish to one day be swooped up by a Richard Gere look-alike and seduced into not being a whore anymore with dreams of grandeur.
I say 'beautiful' 'pretty' 'adorable' because there is beauty to be found in every aspect of life. I see beyond what others see, and I try to discover what others have not. I have a very active imagination, but I can decipher reflections from reality.
I don't care if you're gay, straight, bi, purple, red, white, blue, black, white..When I talk with you, I see the beauty within. No one is better or worse. We all have our strengths & weaknesses. It's time people realized this and got past our apparent differences. Be proud of what you are! I know I am very much so.
I honestly think it is quite stupid when people on here say, "Oh, we're gonna be together forever!". I'd hate to break it to ya, but it's mostly just the sex that keeps people held together. Real love is hard to find these days, and it surprises me how people are so eager to spend the rest of their lives with someone they barely know. Come on, seriously. Enjoy your youth! Be free!
I have an ongoing philosophy on life, and it constantly changes everyday, like the sands in a desert storm. One day I may say or do something, but the next day I may change the way I present it or the way it is perceived. I love proverbs and wise sayings, and I tend to make up my own. I always know what to say to make someone smile or say "Wow..You're so sweet". And it makes me feel whole on the inside. To know that I am the cause of someone's happiness. Doesn't that feel great?
When I say something, I absolutely mean what I say, unless I am angered. But always, always believe me. I am 100 % truthful, but I'm also blunt as fuck. I'm not afraid of going where others tend to overlook. I'm very well-opinionated, and I always say what is on my mind. Why shouldn't I? You wouldn't know how I really felt if I didn't fully express myself. I give many compliments to people I don't even know, because I strive to make others smile & happy. Even going so far as to place their happiness above mine.
The things we do today make us who we are tomorrow. Every second we live our own histories, so I believe in making everything count. Nothing in life is permanent, because every beginning has an ending. So why does anything even matter? Because it does. We are all here to make a difference. Some are merely a ripple upon the lake. But even a small ripple can turn into something large. Maybe one day someone will reflect upon these words, as I hope, and make the best out of life.
People say I'm kind, caring and sweet..yet I do have a bad temper when I am pissed off. I don't get violent, but my words can be as sharp as any dagger. And I can be VERY vengeful..don't be foolish to incur my wrath!! I tend to hold grudges against people who have wronged me in some way, but that is something I need to work on. I always speak my mind, and if I have something to say I won't hold back!
If I make fun of you, it is just out of playfulness. I don't live in a close-minded world. My mind is open 24/7, kinda like McDonald's but without the crappy service & mostly Spanish speakers lol We all need to be more open and accepting if we are to share this world. Remember, you are the future!
L'amour est amer; Il capture nos coeurs, mais peut écraser nos rêves. Je tread torride avec prudence dans ces eaux.
Help me as I drown in my own insanity, caught amidst the waves of my mind. I go through many hardships, as we all do, yet things have gotten better. Thanks to the many wonderful & amazing people out there who have made a difference. My heart is fragile like the wings of a butterfly, so please be respectful of me & the feelings that I express. I am not a mean person, honest I'm not.. It means so much more & it shows me that the world isn't completely without salvation.
Isn't it a sad thing when you can see the world for what it really is? When you see people for what & who they really are? That is why many of us walk around with closed eyes..being blinded to the truth is better than being awakened. Sleep well, misguided ones.
