I cry when i'm happy, i smile when i'm sad, i laugh just for the fun of it, i dance like the whole world is watching. I embrace the rough times because it makes me appreciate the good times more. That is why pain is good because, without it, how would we ever recognize happiness? We must first experience pain to experience true happiness. In the winter of my sorrow, i remember the summer of my joy. I don't regret anything that once made me smile. I can't change the past, i can't predict the future and because i'm a control freak i live only in the present because it's the only place i have some control over. What you see isn't always what you're gonna get, as anyone that knows me already knows. I don't see the glass as half empty or half full, i see it as an opportunity to fill it up or empty it out. I'm way too complicated to figure out, so don't even bother. I'm a mystery that will never be solved.
I have a beautiful little boy named Tyler. He's three and a half. Motherhood is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I love being a mum. I can't imagine my life any other way. I thank God everyday for blessing me with an Angel. I love him more than words can ever express. He's my world, my life, my everything. Here is a poem i've written for the one constant love in my life.
♥ TYLER ♥
I wondered what you would look like, how i would feel the first time i saw you, what thoughts and emotions would run through me the first time i held you in my arms. I realise i never could have known just how much happiness my heart could hold.
Sweet and innocent, one day you'll be a man. Tyler James you're my pride and joy, i hold you close to me, my little boy. One day you will be a man, so let me cuddle you while i can. Your little hand grips mine tight, while you fight sleep with all your might. But i don't mind these wakeful hours, this time together that's all ours. When you're a man i'll hold your child, and remember this with a gentle smile. Because time goes by so terribly fast, i'll cherish and treasure every moment, because i know it won't last. Little boys come in all shapes and sizes, shy and adventurous, full of surprises. Some days halos, some days horns. Everyday a blessing from the day you were born. You keep me busy, and yet all the while, nothing brightens my world like your beautiful smile! ♥
♥ TYLER JAMES ♥
If i could, i would catch you when you fell. But then you'd never know the power of rising up again.
If i could, i would take you directly to your life's destination. But then, you'd never know the thrill of getting lost along the way.
If i could, i would find your true love for you to save you from heartache. But then you'd never know that the joy of true love is in the journey it takes to find it.
If i could, i'd make all your days sunny. But then you'd never behold the beauty of a rainbow.
If i could, i'd surround you with the treasures of the world you live in. But then you'd never appreciate the value of the treasures of the world within you.
If i could, i'd put happiness within your reach. But then you'd never learn that real growth only comes from reaching for things beyond your grasp.
I gave birth to you, but i cannot live your life for you.
I can teach you things, but i cannot make you learn.
I can give you directions, but i cannot be there to lead you.
I can allow you freedom, but i cannot account for it.
I can take you to church, but i cannot make you believe.
I can teach you right from wrong, but i cannot always decide for you.
I can buy you beautiful clothes, but i cannot make you beautiful inside.
I can offer you advice, but i cannot accept it for you.
I can give you love, but i cannot force it upon you.
I can teach you to share, but i cannot make you unselfish.
I can teach you respect, but i cannot force you to show honor.
I can advise you about friends, but cannot choose them for you.
I can advise you about sex, but i cannot keep you pure.
I can tell you the facts of life, but i can’t build your reputation.
I can warn you about drugs, but i can’t say "no" for you.
I can tell you about lofty goals, but i can’t achieve them for you.
I can teach you about kindness, but i can’t force you to be gracious.
I can warn you about sins, but i cannot make you moral.
I can pray for you, but i cannot make you walk with God.
I can tell you how to live, but i cannot give you eternal life.
I can love you with unconditional love all of my life… and I WILL. ♥I LOVE MY LITTLE BOY!
