I haven't changed anything here for quite some time. Perhaps it's time for new things. I'm still the same woman, but undergoing changes again after a long hibernation, with altered currents, corrections. My dream life is different: now an old baroque palace just as in Nathaniel Hawthorne's Rappaccini's Daughter, with a garden of violet flowers with red pistils giving off a fragrance to one side. It's a disquieting dream, but with a purpose. The fragrance of the flowers may seem as a poison, so strong as to subtly influence into a new way of being, and by breathing it in, one becomes something very different, shedding old realities. The violence of that difference, to live in what seems both terrible but incredibly beautiful, is the illusion. Illusions aren't necessary.Now more than ever, I am looking for beautiful things, knowledge, soulful relationships. Once, I often had dreams about water. Deep, beautiful, vibrating indigo bodies of water that I would dive into looking for golden trinkets, finding the bottom covered with ornately carved ebony figurines of boats filled with gold coins.
I want to drink deeply of life, be a tool for helping movement towards better knowledge, self-awareness, and the ecstatic potential of experience for touching the most beautiful, the deep profound within the moment even as both feet touch ground. In the everyday, I'm an Egyptology grad student at the University of Oxford and have a long-standing love affair with words, especially poetry (even good song lyrics will do) and the esoteric. I practice Reiki and other 'shamanic' healing, aim now to make music with beloved friends, and have paths in mind to be artist, writer, and academician all with the right time, development, and gradual effort.
I love the sincere, the playful, the bright, and the simple. Every moment is so fully of beauty and sacredness. Seize it.
