ATTENTION: IT IS OUR GREAT REGRET TO INFORM THOSE OF THE INTERNET COMMUNITY THAT MATTHEW HAS SINCE DIED. WHILST TAKING AN INNOCENT TIPTOE THROUGH THE TULIPS HE WAS UNEXPECTEDLY STRUCK UPON THE HEAD BY A GIANT ANVIL, IMMEDIATELY BESTOWING UPON HIM THE TITLE OF GRATUITOUSLY DECEASED. DONATIONS ARE EXPECTED - POST YOUR CREDIT CARD DETAILS IF YOU HAVE ANY CONSCIENCE. FRIEND REQUESTS WILL BE IGNORED WITHOUT PRIOR MONETARY CONTRIBUTION TO THE MATTHEW PALMER FUND. INCIDENTALLY, MYSPACE IS A PILE OF CRAP. MAY IT DIE THE DEATH IT DESERVES, LIKE MATT DID. IT IS UNLIKELY THIS PAGE WILL EVER BE EDITED AGAIN EXCEPT FOR PSEUDO-COMIC PURPOSES.
