Joo Schmoo profile picture

Joo Schmoo

Hello I would like to order your cheapest bottle of sparkling wine please!

About Me


Watch this Kate Nash video! I love her!!:
NEWSFLASH: Bristol is officially awesome as we bumped into the delectable JLC on Whiteladies Road TWICE in one day!
Also, if anyone on the entire planet can say that they have seen Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, Take That, Therapy?, and Jason Donovan all in the space of one month (apart from my boyf/gigging partner Joel), then I urge you to get in touch - we have a lot to talk about.

Anyway ... I now live in Bristol after moving here in September 2006 from Portsmouth (where I completed a 3-year degree in English and Media Studies in 2005 and got a 2:1). I live with my boyfriend ♥ Joel ♥ , a long-haired Jesus-a-like who I love very much. Me and Joel have adopted a beautiful cat called ♥ Ushki ♥ (hope the landlord isn't reading this), who turned up on our doorstep on January 1st, 2005, and hasn't left since.
Now that I'm in Bristol, I'm working my little socks off juggling jobs at Fat Face and Planet Pizza along with helping out at a primary school and re-doing my Science GCSE as part of my quest to become a teacher.
In Christmas 2005, I met Kemal from BB6 following an immensely camp night of watching him in panto. After speaking to him for a while in the pub, I discovered that he is in fact an [expletive deleted] and threw my vodka and coke in his face! How'd you like me now, bitch!
Which Ramsay Street character do you most identify with?
SusanA schoolteacher, with a messy past including an alcoholic ex-husband and an affair. Still, your terminally ill new spouse should be fun company...
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My Interests



The two men in my life (Joel and Jimmy)

Reading (books and the festival - that joke is a timeless classic)

Face cake

Travelling (only been for a single month in Oz, can't wait to go for longer)

Eating out (don't care that I'm poor!)

Being unemployed (no longer the case but damn, it was fun while it lasted)

Going to the cinema (The Day After Tomorrow was a thoroughly life-changing experience for me)

Writing 'bunt' in perfect cursive

♥ Drinking vodka ♥ (my second best friend) in cheap rundown Australian-themed pubs (Owtback - you know who you are!)

Being anal about spelling (considering starting my own illicit essay-checking business at Uni)

Pluralising words (see GLC for full details)

Abbreviating words (deffo, disso, taco ... the posso's are endless)

Playing games!

Bumming around on my days off work

Making people's eyes hurt on My Space...


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www.myYearbook.com -- Created by 2 high school students to kick myspace's ass

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I'd like to meet:



Already met Therapy? interviewing them for Kerrang! back in '98 (smuggggg!!) - but obviously would ♥ to meet them again ... also my lovely comedy heroes Simon Pegg and Zach Braff, each of whom I would frankly leave Joel for. He he!! Oops, they all appear to be my heroes too. I'm not very imaginative.

My life has been rated:

See what your rating is!

Music:


Therapy?
Terrorvision
Less Than Jake
A
Green Day
Me First and the Gimme Gimmes
Take That
Panic! At The Disco

Movies:

The Day After Tomorrow (obviously)
Shaun of the Dead ( Check out the SOTD game )
School of Rock (Jack Black rules!)
Eternal Sunshine
The 40-Year-Old Virgin
Garden State
Zoolander blah blah blah

Television:

In no particular order...
Spaced - for these reasons:
Get off me you bummer!
Their robot
Cocked, locked and ready to rock!
I'm a little drunk, but I'm perfectly lucid
Let's spend hours in front of our bedroom mirror bogling to ASWAD!
And I shot the cat up the arsehole...
Skip to the end!
Scrubs :
Aaaargh I just said 'slave' in front of my new black girlfriend!
Do you know how many patients I had to ignore to get that score? People died!
I got cable TV and a dead dog, I got plenty of options!
Futurama :
Brannigan's law is like Brannigan's love, hard and fast
South Park :
How would you like to suck my balls?
You seem a little irritable, Kyle. You got some sand in your vagina?
FG :
Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch
Harry Hill's TV Burp
BB/BBLB
Popworld
Lost
Deal or no Deal
Neighbours
EastEnders (back on track, woohoo!!);
The Office :
Check with the vicar first, always
Can I ask you something? Who does your tampons?

Books:



YES I have jumped aboard the commercial bandwagon that is Harry Potter, but I've been on it a long time, dammit, I've enjoyed the ride, and I have no intention of getting off now! I also like Radiohead...

Aside from that rant, gothic stuff like Dracula is awesome; Charles Dickens' Great Expectations is surprisingly likeable, and Ben Elton's High Society is a recommended read (if only I hadn't lent it/had it stolen from me, I could read it again now).

On a more childish/comedic note, Flanimals is fantastically absurd, and perhaps the funniest book you could ever hope to read is John Lennon in His Own Write, a collection of brilliantly surreal short stories which everyone should know about.

Heroes:

In no particular order...

My Blog

Pondering over celebrity

After serving JLC (that's Justin Lee Collins to the non-Channel 4-watching reader) a couple of weeks ago, I have been left a little dismayed. I was so excited watching him make his way down the steps ...
Posted by Joo Schmoo on Sun, 01 Apr 2007 03:22:00 PST

That self-indulgent survey thing that everyone does!

..> Name: Ju/Joo/Roo/Juliette/Hoolietta Birthdate: 4th October 1982 Birthplace: Redhill (near t'airport) Current Location: Brizzle Eye Color: Blue Hair Color: Brunette, currently butchered wi...
Posted by Joo Schmoo on Mon, 29 Jan 2007 11:41:00 PST