A handless midget who doesn't let adversity dampen his dreams.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: What use are names to an entity with no existence outiside the cybersphere?
Birthday: After Jesus but before the Olson Twins
Birthplace: 'Bout two degrees up and one over from the Devil's scabies
Current Location: Same thing but not the same place, somehow...
Eye Color: What azure pools upon a desert oasis at sunset would look like if they were full of bullshit
Hair Color: It looks brown in the picture
Height: Classified information
Right Handed or Left Handed: Depends on what I'm doing. You don't want more detail. Really.
Your Heritage: Last Lord of the De Danaan
The Shoes You Wore Today: The same shoes I wear everyday, Pinky
Your Weakness: Dumbass internet quizzes
Your Fears: Got a few hours and a pen?
Your Perfect Pizza: Topped with arsenic and delivered to the White House
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: See above
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Brett, you're scaring me
Thoughts First Waking Up: Why did I do that?
Your Best Physical Feature: Was burned off in a horific incident involving a curling iron, a red headband, and a throng of screaming Vietnamese men waving cash
Your Bedtime: Whenever my eyes close
Your Most Missed Memory: How can I know what it is if I've missed it? Seriously, am I not getting this question?
Pepsi or Coke: Are both my feudal masters
MacDonalds or Burger King: What, Mickey D's is Scottish now?
Single or Group Dates: Okay, just don't get it in my eye
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Really, these product comparisons are getting old
Chocolate or Vanilla: Really.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Are fun to mix together
Do you Smoke: The question is, do I not smoke
Do you Swear: Like my grandmother
Do you Sing: Rock out in the shower daily
Do you Shower Daily: Only so I can rock out
Have you Been in Love: Now you're just being mean
Do you want to go to College: Jeez, I can't stop going
Do you want to get Married: Do you want me to spray fetid bacon grease up your nose with a turkey baster?
Do you belive in yourself: Cogito ergo sum
Do you get Motion Sickness: Only if I'm moving
Do you think you are Attractive: I have a very small gravitantional field, if I recall my physics class correctly
Are you a Health Freak: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ha ha...*cough*hehheh.... ..*kef*ehem...um. Is it too late to say yes?
Do you get along with your Parents: As long as we don't talk
Do you like Thunderstorms: More than my dog. Who's dead come to think of it. Damn, now I'm sad. Thanks a lot.
Do you play an Instrument: Same one as Tyrone Slothrop
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: I can't remember, the whole month is blacked out for some reason.
In the past month have you Smoked: If not, someone's been stealing a LOT of cigarettes
In the past month have you been on Drugs: I already said the whole month is blacked out.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: What are those?
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: I've been mauling, yes.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: A whole box? You oughta be ashamed of yourself.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No decent places to eat it down here by the Devil's scabies
In the past month have you been on Stage: Does in front of classroom count? I'm acting like I know things...
In the past month have you been Dumped: I would have to be picked up first
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I find clothed activities offensive
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Only things that weren't mine
Ever been Drunk: Anything's possible during those blacked out periods
Ever been called a Tease: Someone has to be interested in order to tease them
Ever been Beaten up: Isn't public school a euphemism for that?
Ever Shoplifted: Yes, but never for profit
How do you want to Die: Absurdly
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Someone who learns his lesson and stops taking these damn quizzes
What country would you most like to Visit: One that isn't full of jerks
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Same as mine, but without the bullshit
Favourite Hair Color: Same as in my picture but in real life
Short or Long Hair: Whatever floats your boat
Height: Tall enough to be seen with the naked eye
Weight: In accordance with height so as to not look freaky
Best Clothing Style: You know how I feel about clothes...
Number of Drugs I have taken: What, like I can remember them all?
Number of CDs I own: Not enough to look cool, but too many to avoid seeming geeky
Number of Piercings: Why would I want to do that to myself?
Number of Tattoos: Well, while we're on the subject of self-mutilation, does occasionally burning yourself with cigarettes count?
Number of things in my Past I Regret: How many things are in my past?
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