God , and ask him what his explanation is for World Poverty, The Spice Girls and Newcastle Fans.
Anyone who follows Scientology , i'm not sure why, as this would likely send me into a depressive state and reassure me that the gene pool is so vigorously spoilt, however i'd probably be able to draw immense amount of pleasure from insulting one. So it would probably be a bitter-sweet moment.
Any Brazilian Female (DISCLAIMER: Below the age of 30!) . For reason why please refer to my 'Sex'.
Roy Keane , so i can shine his shoes with my tonge. See Also God.
My Bank Manager , so i can spike his drink and encourage him to extend my overdraft(s).
The Ladies , the following gets my attention from a girl (aside from her breasts, at least i'm honest!):
Personality , She doesn't need to be funny, she doesn't need to be a female incarnation of einstein, she just needs to be a decent person and genuine.
Paitence , because if i was to ever talk to her, she'd sodding need it!
Curves - No Stick insect, no Big Momma's, i like girls with a nice bit of shape, not to much, and certainly not too little.