† Murder Tramp † profile picture

† Murder Tramp †

A Gothic Revival Play

About Me


Lyrics of the day
Please tell me
Why I belong to you
When I cry
When I cry
For your hands on my skin
Save the only thing you can
Tell me what it is
Don't try to hide the perfect mess
Of your strange behaviour

--"Your hands on my skin " by De/Vision
I'm me. I'm not here to be your lap dog, your whore, your interest. I don't pretend to be perfect and I don't pretend to be special. I can be a wreck sometimes and I've done things to myself which I can't undo and in that process I've lost some people I care about, but all of those things make me who I am. I can't change now and even if I could I don't think I'd want too.
I am happy with myself and my past I have come to terms with and I won't be pitted against my self for anyone's pleasure. I can be skittish at times and timid when it comes to certain things, but I have a mind and opinions and I have reasons for being the way I am. If you care maybe one day you'll find out.
I'm sick of being toyed with, of being hurt, and so if you do it to me don't expect me to stick around. As sweet and nice as I can be I can be cold- no, not a bitch, just cold, icy. It's my protection and I will wield it to it's full extent if I'm attacked.
My friends I would do anything for- a few of you know that. I'll sit up with you at all hours talking, consoling, being a friend but I don't expect that in return. It never seems to be fulfilled. I don't expect anything from those I care about because I'm tired of being hurt in return and it's easier if I don't expect anything- so don't ask.
I don't trust easily, though I might give off that guise. I don't show emotion easily if it is anything other than excitement or happiness. And I don't share with people my feelings on a whim. I'm vulnerable to what people say no matter what anyone likes to think.
I have a guilt complex and it sometimes affects things I do, but you know what, it's gotten better over the years- alot better. It's just something that continues to exist in me.
I'm a writer and by nature writer's lie. We spin stories and tales and exaggerate and diminish important facts, but I never strive to hurt anyone and I don't say things I don't mean. Sometimes my metaphors are more straight forward than my vernacular. Just remember that.
I love sad songs and I love romance- so much so that at times the two intermingle and I don't know where one stops and the other begins. I lose myself in things I can't have and naively am blind to those that exist in front of me. I'm tired of giving my heart to people, but I'm not bitter. This is my last try.
I don't seek your acceptance or your trust and I don't expect you to understand me, because honestly I don't always understand myself. I don't understand but I seek to discover, and if you ask the right questions I can tell you almost anything.
I won't change for you and I won't let you change for me. I value who you are and I accept everything you have to offer, but I won't follow blindly.
Talk to me, I really love making new friends:
AIM FaeryMasque
Yahoo: Faery.Masque
MSN:[email protected]
GoneGothic: http://gonegothic.com/profile.php?user=August
LiveJournal:www.livejournal.com/users/Crypt1c_c0lour
Box Your Thoughts
www.boxedthoughts.com

Don't add me if you won't talk to me.
Contact Box Generated from www....net

My Interests

I like lots of things, but than, I give everything at least one shot, so I suppose that could do it. However, there are a few things which strike my fancy more than others and I suppose that this is the place to put such. I absolutely adore dancing in the rain, to feel the water against me, the dual feelings of being weighted to the earth and floating. I adore dancing in general and I adre horseback riding. I love writing long letters to people and recieving them in return because it lets you know that someone cares enough about you to take a few minutes out of their day to think about you.

I love the feel of silk and the restriction of a corset, the fullness of dresses. I enjoy long walks through sand without my shoes on and I love waking up in the morning with the last remnants of my makeup on because, despite the swift face wash the night before it makes your lips look fuller, your eyes more vibrant.

I love quiet evenings with a book and I love writing my own stories, ideas. I love the Victorian era and the Renaissance. I adore music and dancing around my room with a hairbrush as a microphone. I like getting in the car and having no destination in mind and I love exploring.

I like being by myself but I do love good company. I love being a lady and I love the times I can step it down a notch. I love twisting cliches for my own purpose and I adore animals. I absolutely love getting into a bed that has sheets which are cold to the touch and I love snuggling under the blankets when it is chilly. I love cuddling and I love kissing. I love waking up to a text message that just says "Have a good day" and recieving a smile when I give one first and knowing that people trust me enough to talk to me.

I'd like to meet:

I really don't want to meet anyone. I'm kind of tired of people.

I guess I've been home longer than it takes to rewind. So slap me if I step out of line

Music:

A
AFI
Angelspit
**Apoptygma Bezerk
Absurd Minds
Aiden
Amber Asylum
AliceNine
A Flock of Seagulls
**Alice in Videoland
A Perfect Circle
Alien Sex Fiend

B
Bauhaus
Behind the Scenes
Bella Morte
Billy Joel
**Birthday Massacre, The
Blaqk Audio
Bright Eyes
British Sea Power
Butthole Surfers

C
Carfax Abbey
**Cake
**Combichrist
**Cruxshadows, The
**Cure, The

D
**Dope Stars Inc
**David Bowie
**Deadsy
**Depeche Mode
Dir en Grey
Diva Destruction
**Dresden Dolls, The

E
Eagles, The
Eisbrecher
Ego Likeness
*Emilie Autumn
Evanescence

F
**Faint, The
Front Line Assembly

G
GooGoo Dolls
**Grateful Dead

H
HelloGoodbye
HIM
HorrorPops

I
Informatik

J
Jack off Jill
**James D Stark
Journey
Joy Division
K
**Kill Hannah
Kidney Thieves
Kittie

L
**London After Midnight
**L'Ame Immortelle
Lacuna Coil
Ladytron
**The Last Dance
**Le Tigre
Loudermilk
Lunascape

M
Meatloaf
Ministry
Misery Signals
**Mission UK, The
Miyavi
Monkees, The
MSI
Mushroomhead
My Chemical Romance

N
Nana Kitade
**Neuroticfish
New Order
**Nightwish
Nine Inch Nails

O
**Orgy

P
**Panic!at the Disco
Peter, Paul, and Mary
Paralysed Age
**PomPom Diary
Q
**Queen

R
Rasputina
Razed in Black
Rolling Stones
Royal Visionaries

S
SexyDeath
Silk Demise
Saint Dymphna
Savage Garden
**She Wants Revenge
**Seabound
**Simon and Garfunkle
**Siouxsie and the Banshees
Sisters of Mercy
Sick Puppy
Social Code
**Soil
**Stromkern

T
**ThouShaltNot
**Tegan and Sara
TaTu
TECHNO

U
**Unicorns, The

V
**VNV Nation

W
X
Y
Z
**Zeromancer

Some of my favorite lyrics

"Biting Keeps your words at bay
Ending to the sores that stay
Happiness is but a gash away" ---Bad Habit, The Dresden Dolls

"In a moment's time I might refrain from breathing
With her hand in mine
Something is breaking faster
Through a vapid sky I see a world unravel
I look into her eyes and see the end." ---Edge of the World, The Cruxshadows

"In the heat of Passion's war
Lust is spilt upon the floor
Staining red the wasted metaphor." --Violet, The Birthday Massacre

"Promise me to Pass the time
Dance with me on Plastic Tears
Kiss me we won't be alone
Till Morning when we disappear." --Promise Me, The Birthday Massacre

"Dance with me,
Under a bloodred Sea" --The Twisting, Loudermilk

"Innocent child
How you thought you knew me
Understood my ways
My dark needs
The chase is not the thrill I'm after
The kill, the conquest to be your master!"--The Bondage Song, London After Midnight

"Maybe I feel detatached
I may just look to shy
It's a disinterest not that I'm a timid guy." --Glass Danse, The Faint

"I'm everything you want
I'm everything you need
I'm everything inside of you that you wish you could be.
I say all the right things at exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why." ---Everything You Want, Vertical Horizon

"We are nothing but Eurotrash
We take plastic
And we take cash
We sell our hearts, second class
We slit our throats on tinted glass." --Eurotrash, Zeromance

Movies:

GYPSY 83
Legend
Lord of the Rings
Velvet Goldmine
The Last Unicorn
History of the World, Part 1
Girl With a Pearl Earring
Russian Arc
Love Bites
Vanity Fair
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
Benny and Joon
Howl's Moving Castle

Television:

I'm not a big fan of television, though occasionally I do watch it...especially when I'm bored.

Books:

Oh..I love to read. ~grin~ ()Yes, I am a dork..() However my favorite books fall into several categories so here it goes:

Romance:
Once a Princess, Silver Angel ---Johanna Lindsey
Love in Vein 1 and Love in Vein 2 ----Anthologies edited by Poppy Z. Brite.

Fantasy:
THE BLACK JEWELS TRILOGY, Shadows and Light ---Anne Bishop
The Anne RIce Novels

Classics:
A Room with a View, Pride and Predjudice, Wuthering Heights, Dracula

Fiction:
Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Normal World of Boys, The Kitchen Boy, The Tattooed Girl, and I,Lucifer

Heroes:

I used to have heros. Now I just look up to people, and mainly that person is my sister, Sarah. She is one of the strongest most amazing people I know and I don't know what I'd do without her.

My Blog

To Several of you...a "You" post.

* I miss you.  Every day I miss you and I didn't think it would be this hard.  Sometimes I felt neglected whenever you got a boyfriend, but you were my confidant and my best friend.  I ...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Tue, 05 Feb 2008 06:59:00 PST

Story time. xD

Here's a story for you kiddies:There's a boy right, named Keith.And there's a girl, named Emily.And this girl likes this boy.He makes her happy.Quite happy.That is all.Because this girl named Emily do...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Tue, 08 Jan 2008 03:40:00 PST

I’m not made of stone. Things do hurt.

I shouldn't let it bother me but I can't help it.  And because if that I know i have to find a distance.  I can't keep doing this...pretending things don't matter when they so obviously do.F...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Mon, 07 Jan 2008 12:05:00 PST

Some recaps from the past year.

This year has been a crazy one.  Completely crazy- not bad though.I finally decided what I wanted to do.  It's writing..and while it had been writing for a long time, I went through several ...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Wed, 02 Jan 2008 11:32:00 PST

New Years Resolutions/Goals. xD

My resolutions...or rather, goals.1) Use the internet less- or rather, talk to people less that I don't know. I keep letting myself get enamoured and caught up in people'slives which I don't need.&nbs...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Wed, 02 Jan 2008 06:43:00 PST

Go ahead, slide the knife deeper in.

It hurt to talk to you on the phone today and all I can think of his the way it hurt when I spoke with Dave sometimes or the way it hurt when I spoke with Nicole sometimes and I don't know if I can de...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Tue, 01 Jan 2008 01:00:00 PST

Whether I swim or sink, that’s no concern of yours now

You've lost your chance.  I've soldiered on despite everything but I can't continue this charade much longer.I've been pushed away and I can take a hint, I can take a hint very very well, better ...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Sun, 30 Dec 2007 10:18:00 PST

You frighten me, it’s getting harder to conceal. </3

I don't have the energy to make an effort and I don't have the desire to find that energy.  I just want to curl up and sleep this all away, but I won't be able to sleep long enough to do that.&nb...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Wed, 12 Dec 2007 05:03:00 PST

.We could have flown like pollen.

I'm done holding out hope for people and I'm done giving that hope in return.  I can't deal with it anymore and I shouldn't have to, I shouldn't have to at all. I shouldn't have to cater to every...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Thu, 29 Nov 2007 06:09:00 PST

Tagged by Ali..and tags at the bottom.

"Once you have been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 random things, facts, habits, or goals about yourself."[1] I sometimes blur the line between reality and fantasy....so much so that I forg...
Posted by Murder Tramp on Mon, 12 Nov 2007 02:09:00 PST