About Me
Greetings Earthlings!
ARE you CONCIOUSLY CHALLANGED?
File: Pelinpala
System coding engineer: Tommi Sirkiä
Human number: csxl137596
internal prossecing speed: Alpha double plus good
Side efx: Pseudo Stereo, Sizzilian Sizzle Stick
Product: inventor of sonic Thought manipulation device: SuperMolecularDustSeperator
Achievements:
-Shot kennedy in the 60..s (twice!)
-Adopted with marilyn monroe in the 50..s
-Saw elvis performing live at area 51 to earthlings!
-Stopped time for 1 minute & 3 seconds on 13.4.1983 at 17:43 before the neon "ski mask on" revolution
-Got the time back after winning the revolution
-Trapped humans into their own bodies to ensure his own supernatural, ultrasonic & superior abilities
-Got a new penis enlargement surgery which gave him a total of 45.6cm more than jesus had
-Developed a second personality in '98 twice as big as his penis size!
-Met Hurdan Hanari who Gave him alot to think about.
-Currently busy running the universe and controling time with fjonging disciplines.
Pertti Pyylevi, born 1927
After teaching 9 years of etnographic cultural anthropology at the university of Raja Jooseppi, professor dr. Pertti Pyylevi won the famous walter aspesti-award for field studies over the 60th parallel. Professor dr. Pyylevi decided to call it a day at the university and dedicate himself completely and passionately to field studies. The newest subject would be the very small and forgotten karhu-tribe with only 20 living members.
During his field trips and social hierarchy investigations, professor dr. Pyylevi soon began to get more and more intreagued by the highly rhythmical patterns of the ritualistic rites performed by the tribe every 9 days. The chief of the tribe, hnahi pesäke, asked professor dr. Pyylevi to accompany him at a ritual pipe smoking ceremony and to drink a little vodka-like pirtu (hampaaton vuosikerta) with him (as it is custom in lapland). Then the chief asked the professor many questions and told him many things about his tribe.
Professor dr. Pyylevi about the meeting:
"As soon as i stepped into chief hnahi pesäke..s kota i knew that he knew why i had come. But he also knew that the real purpose for my long visit with the tribe was to be something else. The chief didn..t tell me more about his thoughts but welcomed me on behalf of the community and lit up his pipe."
And that..s when it happened. Oohhh! It happend so suddenly and fast! He was abducted by an ufo floating up, up, up in the sky. "Yo!", said the humanoid with long funny red hair who introduced himself as jack alien kenedi. "I have come here to take over the world n i ain..t no god damn billy-bob or lou-ann!", he said. And after convincing the whomanoid that the only reasonable way to take over the world was with musical hypnotic manipulation and tonal mind control (to achieve total thought re-programming and emotion coding) they decided to unite their powers and give birth to the Haltya-project!
Soon after the incident Pertti Pyylevi understood what the chief had told him and changed his name from Pertti to Tauno because of some serious supo harrassment during the canobot..s space invadings. He also got himself astromoleculary re-arranged through the SuperMolecularDustSepera- tor which Jack had given him for christmas ("the jesus-party"). Finally the professor was a professional with a profession to proove proactive professories in professor investigation!
Tauno (ex-Pertti) & jack alien kennedi moved to a finnish lande resort to produce the most mind blowing music (n)ever heard. By combining alien technology and whoman nou hau it was now possible to use unltrasonic frequencies, which are not audible to the human ear, in the music which they created. The purpose of these frequencies was to code movements into humans through subconscious brain activity. Let it be known that until this day it has never been possible to explain the unltracurve shaped over the top, moving with an amazing 60 mph, to the brother who had no hands which is quite a blessing if you think about it over at lunch break in the West-Pakula resort where there live no ordinary people and no understanding is required to know what you had known without the jelly donut and the rasberry cream womanizing space cadet who had the guts to tell the major that minor was the only possible explanation to the fact that there are also many palm trees and a lot of milk if you want to drink from the bottle you should always remember that ms. Herpes might have drunken from it too and spat in the glas from which the drifnuktialously funking piip-peli puzzle convetion was not the only way out to the only way in in the ultra dementionally challenged outro intro retro productively. It was time to do some överikool dance production remixes with some of those nice boys who are not the ones who were here to meet me last saturday was the best party i have never been to without having the problems like an ordinary teini- ikäinen has no problems with the fact that it is not the same ass as the following page will let you know that it was not the one of those boys. The unltra sphered mind overtaking unltrasampled investigating minimalisticalic megamusically designed galactica looking neverending being of an humanoidic astral superpowered robotized lager bisse. Now as the mega super hyper ultra power pro sub sonic 2000 xl millenium y2k programming is possible the astrophysical phycisists have created the ISM which is M. and M:ish isn..t because the communISM became a lizard after eating too many lab rats. It is not common that the into-galactic wormhole eating holospheric lasertype of the continuously challanged and otherworldishlyizedismlytizednicalnicalyism.ISM. werneralienifromativenviromentraumanalogicalionoutriuphicala ma?
What did you expect? a curriculum vitae?
By: Rikki Martin
P.S. Just because your paranoid doesn..t mean that they..re not after you!
Equipment used in Tauno..s tracks: Steinway & son..s flygel, mini-moog, Roland m100, Roland sh-09, Hammond gold edition, Fender stratocaster guitars, Gretsh drums, Yamaha bass, Boss efx pedals, Marshal guitar amplifier, Gallien-Grueger bass amplifiers, Zildian cymbals, Hohner harmonicas, Genelec monitors, 02r Yamaha digital mixer, Shure mic..s, D..adario strings & ill-logic sequencing
The SuperMolecularDustSeperator
The original ritualistic Karhu tribe Rhythm Shticks
