mom to many

My Heroes:Jesus My husband The five beautiful children God blessed me with: Ashley Autumn Jeffrey Erica Tiffany The five gorgeous grandbabies God blessed me with. Brittany Kaylee Trace Taylor Tait My unborn grandchild that's due in June and my unborn grandchild that will be resting in Jesus' arms People who TRULY love you unconditionally People who don't talk bad about you to make themselves look better or to gain sympathy for themselves People who put others before themselves People who show affection and not just when someone is looking People who aren't afraid to be different Girls who don't "need" a guy to make them "happy" or "complete" Anyone who manages to get through life with an intact self esteem Family who sticks together through thick and thin, but always remembers to say "I'm sorry" when they hurt someone and ask for forgiveness and honestly not try to make the same mistake twice. All my life my heroes have been my children. I have loved them with all my heart unconditionally. I have tried to be the best mother I could to all of them. As long as I'm living, my babies you'll be. You never know what REAL love is until you have a child.♥ RANDOM THINGS ♥I WISH I COULD HUG MY GRANNY AND MY MOM JUST ONE MORE TIME AND SAY I LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU FOR LOVING ME.I NEVER KNEW HOW BAD IT WOULD HURT NOT HAVING MY MOM IN MY LIFE ANYMORE.I WISH WE DIDN'T HAVE TO DIE.I NEVER KNEW I HAD SO MANY TEARS INSIDE ME THAT NEEDED TO COME OUT.I wish my daughter would come home and be a mommy to her kids. I love her and miss her and worry about her every day.My beautiful newest grandbaby Tait arrived on April 15, 2006. The day after my mother passed away. He is such a beautiful baby boy and a joy to us all. Taylor loves him SO much and is such a wonderful big sister.I miss my other grandbabies so much. I want my children to be happy in their lives and especially their relationships.I wish I could take the pain away when my "babies" hurt.I believe in karma. We all get what we deserve in the end. What goes around comes around. The pain you cause you will get back tenfold.I love most of my children's friends.All my life, my one wish was for: my family to live close to me so they could be here for Sunday dinners and holidays.If I love you, I never stop loving you and you will always be special to me.If I don't like you, it's hard for you to convince me otherwise because I can usually judge you the first time I meet you.I love my grandchildren with all my heart. They are all so very beautiful. My dream is to have them all together with Nanny and take pictures of all them together and just enjoy being a "real" family. Again, I wish my daughter would come home. I am so afraid she is going to die.I wish Derrick's dad would let him see Autumn.I wish Joe & Ashley would grow up and get married and be happy. I think they belong together.I wish my daughters didn't have to go to FC where it seems everyone there is more of a child than my 2 year old granddaughter. It's so sad.I love my job.I love my husband. We have our "times" but he means the world to me.I'm STILL so very proud of my son.My girls are beautiful.+ if i wasn't so old, i'd probably have my tongue pierced+ i sometimes feel invisible+ i definitely don't want my lip pierced!+ i love all the "Romance/Garden" scents at Victoria's Secret+ i wish my kids knew how much i really love them+ i wish i wasn't so tired all the time+ i love working from home+ i never grew up with my mom or my dad+ my dad died of lung cancer at the age of 62; i was just starting to get to know him+ i love good-smelling candles+ i have been called a "drama queen" by a couple of people, i don't WANT the drama in my life, someone else please take it+ i've always wanted to write my life story+ i wish i was a better person+ i am very afraid of dying+ i love the smell of a new puppy's breath+ babies have the silkiest softest skin+ i loved to hold my kids close for hours at a time when they were babies + i have mellowed out the older i get+ i have a tendency to be occasionally anti-social, actually a lot more than occasional+ people used to walk all over me+ i have two sisters and two brothers who i didn't find until i was 21+ i only really talk to one of the brothers now+ i used to be thin and wear thongs; probably still would if i could cuz some of them are SO cute+ i started smoking again 2 weeks ago because of extreme stress after quitting for almost 2 years+ i joined the Rec Center so I could exercise+ i want to get healthy+ i have four grandchildren and one on the way; i only get to see one of them pretty regularly right now+ that breaks my heart+ i like to eat out+ i hate to wash dishes+ i wish there were more baby pictures of me+ when i listen to music, i do listen to alot of country music because it "says something," but i also listen to alot of other music too+ i like furry boots+ i am frequently sarcastic+ my nephew jeremy bites me on the back every time i see+ i don't really have a "best girlfriend"+ i hardly ever do my own thing+ i used to live in a trailer and i have to say it's much better than an apartment+ i hate drugs+ one of my children is a crack addict and every day I pray that she will find her way back to her family that loves her.+ that breaks my heart+ my dog of almost 5 years, toby, had to be put to sleep on Christmas Day+ i got another dog named Max+ i am yet another hopeless romantic+ hugs over drugs+ i am messy & unorganized in an organized way+ i can be quite cynical+ unique for sure+ my mind is one mess of processing thoughts 24/7+ in other words, i think a lot, or too much+ i have insomnia+ i am afraid of heights, mice, and snakes+ i dont mind being alone sometimes+ i'm very insecure+ i'm not good in a crowd+ i like to be hugged & kissed+ i go to bed late+ far from perfection yet am a perfectionist+ i analyze things way too much+ my hair is colored burgandy this month+ i look down when i walk, sometimes i have found some pretty incredible things like that+ i love the beach+ i miss the mountains+ i am usually always tired+ i asphixiate myself in worries+ not spontaneous+ i'm stubborn+ i am the "oldest child"+ i have 5 beautiful children+ i can't stand exes who turn their back on their children + i always make up weird nicknames for people+ i really hate infomercials+ i am a procrastinator, but dont mean to be. and don't like other people procrastinating+ my pet peeve is women who "stand" over the toilet to pee and get their pee all over the seat for ME to sit down in YUK!+ my favorite color is pink+ clumsy sometimes+ if you make me laugh, you can be my best friend+ i would love to travel+ i have to be in the mood to cleaning+ i need a tan+ i really like cowboys, but hate rednecks+ at night i sit on my balcony and watch the stars alone+ i want to be loved+ i like to walk on the beach+ i love the smell of the beach+ i have not had a candle light dinner in like forever ///that upsets me :/+ i have brown eyes+ i am right handed+ i love the sound of thunderstorms, but don't like the lightening+ my sides are very ticklish+ i have some regrets, but they got me here+ i have went skinny dipping more then once+ i Love Bread, Pasta, and Chocolate+ i am very self-conscious about my outward appearance+ i think i've moved past the "i need a man to survive" stage of my life+ i like compliments, but usually don't know how to respond to them+ i think it's amazing how much you can love your grandchildren+ i think sometimes in life we have to make choices for the benefit of others that really hurt US♥♥♥♥♥