T.RAY - ProfilesArchive

About Me

GETTIN MY LIFE BACK ON TRACK. CANT BELIEVE I LET A BROAD RUIN MY HAPPINESS. BUT THATS AIIGHT. LIKE GOD HAD A PLAN FOR ME, HE HAS ONE FOR HER,AND IN IT.SHE WILL FIND HER MISERY. GOD HAS A FUKKED UP WAY OF SHOWIN A NIGGA HE IS FUKKIN UP,AND FOR ME AN EVEN MORE FUKKED UP WAY TO FIX IT. IVE GOTTEN USED TO LEARNING HARD LESSONS, NEVER KNOWING THE SIMPLE ANSWER TO PREVENT THEM. SO I NEVER WENT ANYWHERE IN LIFE,AND IF I DID GO SOMEWHERE IT WASNT FAR OR LONG. BUT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE THE PLACE I WAS IN GAVE ME A NEWFOUND FREEDOM FOR GETTIN OUT THERE IN LIFE, GETTIN MY FEET WET,AND SEEING THE WORLD. I DONT KNOW IF THAT MADE ANY SENSE, BUT THATS HOW MY FUKKED UP MIND PERCIEVES IT. BUT REALLY, IM AIIGHT. I FEEL GOOD, REAL GOOD. AND ALL I CAN DO IS SHARE MY NEWFOUND HAPPINESS WITH THOSE CLOSE TO ME AS WE TRUDGE THIS ROAD OF LIFE TOGETHER. NOBODY EVER SAID THIS ROAD OF RECOVERY WAS GONNA BE EASY, NOR DO I EXPECT IT TO BE. I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING, LOOK AT MYSELF IN THE MIRROR,AND JUST SAY"TRY TRY TRY,TRY FOR YOURSELF. ITS YOURSELF THAT MATTERS. ITS YOURSELF THAT KEEPS YOU HERE.DO IT FOR YOU. ITLL MAKE YOU A BETTER PERSON TODAY AND TOMORROW." STAYING POSITIVE AFTER SO MUCH BULLSHIT HAS HAPPENED IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE,AND I KNOW EVERYTHING HAPPENS IN GODS TIME AND NOT YOURS BUT WAITING ON HIS TIME IS JUST MAKING ME MISERABLE. I HAVE TOO MUCH ALONE TIME WITH MY HEAD,AND THE THOUGHTS ARE KILLIN ME, THOSE OLD THOUGHTS WONT LEAVE MY HEAD CUZ THERES NOTHING NEW TO REPLACE THEM WITH. IM ME, BUT IM NOT ME. IM HERE, BUT IM NOT HERE. I NEED HELP, BUT I DONT WANT IT. CONFUSED PEOPLE? SO AM I, NOW WE'RE ON THE SAME PAGE.
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My Interests

JON LAW HOLDS A NIGGA BACK FROM HIS USUAL SWAGGLE....SLIGHTLY. THE CPU SKILLS R THAT MUCH MORE ENHANCED,IM PROBABLY WATCHIN U ON A CAM RIGHT NOW. GET YA FINGER OUT YA NOSE! OR CONTROLLING YOUR MOUSE. ITS FUN I LUV IT. EVERYTHING IS FREE. U NEED MOVIES,HIT ME. I LIVE AT A HOUSE WITH A POOL TABLE,SO ITS REAL EASY TO FUKK WIT PEOPLE AND CON THEM OUT OF THEIR MONEY NOW.THINKING OF JOINING A LEAGUE.STILL HITTIN THE GYM,STILL ROLLARBLADE,MAINTENENCE HAS PUT CAR CUSTOMS ON HOLD. BUT I FOUND SUM RIMS AND A LITTLE SYSTEM JUST GOTTA PUT EM ON. I PLAY FOOTBALL ON SATURDAYS WITH THESE KIDS THAT THINK IM WASHED UP,IM 23,THEYRE 20. IF IM NOT BEATIN YA ASS ON MADDEN 08',(ON PS2,HAVENT GOTTEN TO TRY ON 360 YET)IM WATCHIN THE NFL CHANNEL LIKE ITS THE EVENING NEWS.I TOLD THEM I KNOW MY SHIT,AND IM FAR FROM WASHED UP,AND MY CUSIN IS IN THE NFL.HE IS A FREE AGENT RIGHT NOW.BUT THAT JUST PROVES I LACK POTENTIAL. IF IM NOT DOING ANY OF THAT IM AT HOME OR IN RIVERSIDE. FUKK PAULS HOUSE, IVE HAD ENOUGH WITH SO CALLED FRIENDS TRYIN TO PLAY ME FOR A FOOL THIS YEAR. U CANT CON A CON MAN, WHEN WILL U WHITE PEOPLE(AND SPAINAIRDS) LEARN.MY INTERESTS IN SWORDS,AXES, THROW KNIFES,AND COMPACT BOW LEAD ME TO THIS QUOTE"AS SILENTLY AS U TRIED TO PLAY ME,WATCH HOW SILENTLY.......I SILENCE U. SO LISTEN FOR THE PIN DROP." NO KIND OF TEST WILL EVER MAKE ME QUIT SMOKIN.ITS DWINDLED ALITTLE AT TIMES CAUSE OF MONEY,AND DEALERS I HAD TO LET GO. BUT LIKE ALWAYS, I....FIND ....THE.....BOMB,AND THEN I GET STUCK AS A MIDDLE.STILL CANT HOLD MY OWN.I DONT GET IT."I TRY SO HARD,CANT SEEM TO GET AWAY FROM MISERY. I TRY SO HARD,ALWAYS BE A VICTIM OF THESE STREETS. IT AINT MY FAULT CAUSE I, TRY TO GET AWAY BUT TROUBLE FOLLOWS ME.AND STILL I TRY SO HARD,HOPIN ONE DAY YOULL COME AND RESCUE ME.....BUT UNTIL THEN. ILL BE HUSTLIN ON THESE STREETS IN SLEET,HAIL,SNOW."

I'd like to meet:

The fukkin bastard that thought he could get away with trying to ruin my life. Almost happened.................but guess what............Im still here................and imma git u good boy.............anytime......................any place. BREATHE EAZY FOR NOW.

Music:

MUSIC MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND,UP AND DOWN. IM LEARNIN HOW TO MAKE MY OWN BEATS RIGHT NOW. TO NAME SUM MUSIC:THE GAME, MIKE JONES,CAKE,YOUNG BUCK,LUDA,LIL WAYNE,LIL JON,LIL SCRAPP,RHCP,SUBLIME,QUEEN,AL GREEN,DELFONICS,311, THAT DJ KHALED CD IS THE SHIT! IM SOOOO HOOD!

Television:

NFL CHANNEL IF I CANT FIND ANYTHING AT ALL, I BREATHE THIS CHANNEL. CARTOONS: SIMPSONS FAMILY GUY, AMERICAN DAD,FUTURAMA, THE BOONDOCKS, PINKY AND THE BRAIN,SPONGEBOB IS A CRACKUP TO ME, I DONT KNOW WHY,AND THE OLD SCHOOL LOONEY TUNES. MISSED FIRST EPISODE OF PRISON BREAK SEASON TWO, ACTUALLY I MISSED THE FIRST ONE TOO. SO I PUT THE BOX SET ON MY X-MAS LIST. CSI:MIAMI IS THE SHIT,NEXT,ROOM RAIDERS,RUN HOUSE,AND I DONT REMEMBER WHY OR HOW BUT ME AND GERRY GOT INTO I LOVE NEW YORK. WE HAVENT MISSED A SHOW THIS SEASON. THERS JUST SUMTHIN ABOUT IT

Heroes:

ANYONE WHO HELPS ME MAKE A STEP HIGHER.......... ANYONE WHO BELIEVES ME AND IN ME........... THE ONE I CANT FIND,BUT WILL FIND ME,AND WONT WANNA LEAVE....... (AND HELL...IF SHE DOES,MAYBE THIS ONE WILL HAVE THE HEART TO BE HONEST) MY MOMMA..... IM MY HERO,CUZ WITHOUT ME. THIS LIFE AINT POSSIBLE.