Matt - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I am a hard working son-of-a-bitch! I ride street bikes, have lots of toys, enjoy camping,wakeboarding, and enjoy doing anything outdoors. I have a very small penis that I don't know how to work it....I am a lameo in bed!! And I have HORRIBBLE ASS GAS!!! Not to mention the fact I have one testicle.....call me ladies, I am a real wiener I mean winner!!! ***GIT-R-DONE***

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My Interests

My special interets include fighting fires and putting out your fire baby!!! (Find 'em hot and leave 'em wet!)
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I'd like to meet:

Woman who don't mind two pump chumps!! Women that have two breasts would be a bonus!!

Music:

Of course all of the sensual stuff.....

Movies:

Top Gun, Tombstone, and Days of Thunder.....these movies are fucking bad ass!..

Television:

Huntin' stuff....and cops of course...waiting to see my debut on there.......Rescue Me and AND MY ULTIMATE FAVORITE THE GOLDEN GIRLS!!

Books:

Playboy, Hustler, Swank, Hot to keep a girl happy, BBW, the Viagra Instruction book, the Natural Male Inhancement Book, How to Work it with one Testicle, and How to use a penis pump by Austin Powers.

Heroes:

Larry the Cable Guy, Tom Cruise (he got Katie Holmes for fucks sake), and any guy that can keep it up for more than 30 seconds and has TWO BALLS.