found this love layout at HOT FreeLayouts.comI'm a former stripper, turned C-movie porn queen, and now wannabe authoress. It's quite a strange combination considering my background. My mother came from circus freaks. I'm not talking about just your ordinary strange people...I'm talking about your run-of-the-mill traveling carnival family. My great-grandfather was a lobster-man. He had 2 deformed hands that looked like lobster claws hence the name...unfortunately the nomenclature would have been slightly more accurate if he was of Scottish-Irish descent with their typical Rudy-colored skin...but instead he was Italian...He married a snake-charmer...she was of Romanian descent and said to have been descended from centuries worth of gypsies...but who really knows. Their only son was a fire-breather. He learned his trade from a couple of midgets who joined my great-grandparents circus for a couple of years when he was just a small child...He originally wasn't an only child, but there were a couple of "accidents" that lead to the deaths of his siblings. Grandfather never liked to talk about it, but I gather it was related to his early attempts at firebreathing. Apparently, young children are not flame resistant. After the final of the accidental demises of his 7 siblings, Grandfather ran away from the circus to Germany, where he met my Grandmother, the Countess von Biestlering. Contrary to her location, she was actually of Scandinavian descent or so the story goes. Apparently she defied her family and refused to be a part of the aristocracy because she so adamantly believed in communism. Grandmother never really paid attention to details, instead listened to a stupid man who once courted her and wanting to impress him, decided to wholeheartedly agree with his ideals, even if it did mean disagreeing with everything she once knew. If only she read Marx, she would have realized that it was just a load of crap. Nonetheless, the disinherited heiress, met my circus freak of a Grandfather and fell in love with him. Luckily for her, or possibly for him, because she was very superficial, he did not inherit the claw-handedness feature of his father, otherwise the union probably never would have taken place. Thank goodness for better DNA...the grandparents were able to rome Europe for a while before the war broke out, sadly, both believed that Stalin would be the Savior of the universe, so then ended up spending some time in the Eastern Block. Turns out, they found out that communism sucked and as luck would have it, they met some American friends and were able to then leave and make their way into the Glorious United States where they for some unknown reason decided to settle in Idaho of all places.. I swear, for the first ten years of my life, I was convinced that that was the official name of our country. Once in the US, they had a shitload of kids, including my mother who then met and married my father. Oh yeah, my father's family...they're just a bunch of farmers of Hungarian descent, I would tell you more, but there' s nothing to tell...it's all pretty boring. I do have to admit in a country where divorce is so prevalent, not one single person in my family has ever been divorced. ... We believe in murder instead. Just kidding, but not really. Oh yeah, one more thing about me. I collect string. I believe that if I can unite string from all parts of the world, then I might be able to achieve world peace. So far I have string from 37 different countries. With string we will be tied together.I edited my profile with Thomas' Myspace Editor V4.4
JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS lyrics
