Benjamin - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'm a visitor in the land of life, I never know when my pass is going to expire and I'll be asked to leave. I hate everything and everyone but I love everything and everyone at the same time. I like to spin in circles uncontrollably sometimes. I've always been a salesman and a smooth talker, things that make my life into a shambles if I let them, things that drive me crazy when I think about them, I want to walk a hundred and two miles and then change my name and walk a hundred and three more. I want to be the guy that no one asks for advice about things. I want to be the kind of person that would just sell or leave behind everything I have to travel to a distant locale and swim in crystal clear blue water that would cleanse me and take all the dirt that clouds my vision away. I want to be the kind of guy that says lickity-split. I want to be able to look in the mirror without wishing I could break it. I want to be stable. I hate stable. I'm an insurance agent, that's the least stable job EVER!

My Interests

Music music music music music, reading, writing, music, movies, reading, and being entirely self destructive

I'd like to meet:

Someone open to life and its possibilities :)

Music:

Pinback, Death Cab for Cutie, Bjork, SDRE, Blink (I don't care if they sold out, they'll always be my boys) Smashing Pumpkins, The Cure, Outkast, Sigur Ros, Interpol, Weezer, American Football, Owen, Postal Service, Fisher Spooner, Joy Division, The Anniversery, Cursive, The Good Life, Owen, Cat Stevens, James Taylor, Johnny Cash, ALWAYS BOB DYLAN

Movies:

Any Wes Anderson, Any Bill Murray, any Jon Hughes, any Cusack, Great Expectations, Shakespeare in Love, Magnolia, SLC Punk, Detroit Rock City

Television:

Six Feet Under

Books:

Anything Salinger especially the Catcher in the Rye, Perks of Being a Wallflower (it's a requirement in the emo/indy union to read it) Any Poe, Any Whitman, Ginsberg, anything classic, also a lot of fantasy books but that's a remnant from my not so illustrious past as a geek

Heroes:

Anyone with the courage to live life

My Blog

Under a Honeymoon.....

So here I am, adrift in a sea of the best intentions, watching the shoreline dwindle in the distance, and realizing completely for the first time that I'll never set foot there again. No matter how m...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Jack's a favorite friend, he'll be with me till my end

I played a show.....and i was paralyzed with fear...... I don't know why i get so scared when i play music. But i do love it so. Some things i have to let out or they'll burst their own way out. ...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Yellow black and blue

"It's all about, taking the easy way out again.....i suppose" -Elliott Smith "yellow black and blue, remind me of you, savior's instep, with the cutting room lefts" -Benji/Ashley -los...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Solitude and Singed Eyelashes

where do these feelings come from, the hurt, the doubt, the solitude, the singed eyelashes i make burnt offerings of my puppet strings to the powers that be still i linger i'm going to tap da...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Tonight was.....unexpected

So i started off tonight on a bit of a bad note But then things moved to a much better climate... I don't even have any prose......I just feel at peace If I could be cradled by love and a lulla...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Grass Colored Grins

Hold out your hands, your limbs, the crooked and jagged lines exemplified by the warmth beating within, cup the hands to catch the wealth that floats, tiny little golden dust motes, freely flowing,...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Carbon Copy Cabana Cancer

I'm sick with this carbon copy cabana cancer a rythm of unatural rot that takes up my clever thoughts and disassembles the righteous preambles and innerworkings that I have so inconcievably lost a...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

A Decent Nights Sleep

(a new song) I wish I was wishing for something to wish for Wish for something more than nothing Wishing for warm blood, but stuck with the cold blood Reaching for hard luck, but lost in the eth...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

You are a rose tinted glass full of vodka and ash

And the seems come apart, shedding stitches and hurt and we dream the dreams of independent fiends with a heart shaped drum we pound at our lungs and the tips of our toes turn shades commensurate w...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

An excerpt from the short story: A green thumb means green blood

.....and the son looked down at the ground, where the young sproutling of the willow tree lay cracked and dying. "Why is the baby tree dying?" asked the boy, a small tear starting in the corner of ...
Posted by Benjamin on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST