Hello, I am the Viscount of Killarney. I don't know Prince William...so don't ask me about him!I love fireworks. For the most part, people seem to like me. It’s not your fault...but I’m witty. I try to warn people of this before they get to know me, and sure enough they act shocked when they actually realize it. I was born in the great state of West Virginia where I worked as a coal miner until my 3rd birthday. I love ALL people on MySpace. The weirder the better. I don’t like having naked pictures sent to me though...unless you're hot....and you don’t tell anyone you sent them. I don’t have naked pictures of myself...so don’t ask me for them...unless you want to. Guess what? CHICKEN BUTT! I don't really do a lot of "Viscounting" cause, well...I don't exactly know how. By nature…I am a storyteller. I've never eaten another person...sober anyway. If I did I probably regretted doing it the next day, and it most likely gave me the runs. I don’t want to be an astronaut. I'm claustraphobic. I don’t know how to spell claustrophobic? I am a kind person, however, I am also quite unreliable. If you ever need someone to be there for you in case of an emergency...make me like number 10 on your list of people to call. I try not to lie and I rarely do. I only sleep 3 hours a night. Usually in a wooden chair…with the lights on. I enjoy exaggerating truths. I would rather drown a puppy with blue eyes than eat a micron of peanut butter. Ironing clothes brings me the same joy as fat people finding twinkies. If I ever got a nickname...I would want one like the late rapper "Old Dirty Bastard"...it is simple and to the point. I've only been to jail one time...but she deserved it. I can make 1/2 hour brownies in 10 minutes, and have fake teeth. I can dance like Michael Jackson, but can’t molest children half as well. I have never been made "The Sexiest Man Alive" but people are still up in arms about it. I love to meet new people. If you are a “Bad†person, that’s OK too….because I tell dead baby jokes. I practice kissing on my arm, and sometimes when I set my alarm clock...I pretend that it is a bomb I have to diffuse. I have met people smarter than me, but they were never as good-looking. Every time I have met someone better looking than me my pecker was bigger...or I like to imagine so. I’ve drank an entire bottle of mouthwash and it almost killed me. That is why swish, and NEVER swallow (the context is at your discretion). When I was a toddler, my mom used to dress me up in bowties, including knee-high socks and a little sailor cap. This should explain why I am so utterly FUCKED up. I apologize, but I don’t have a single sex tape of myself for my, or your viewing pleasure. I don’t call it arrogance...I call it self-confidence. I am named after a one-legged man named Timothy.If nothing else, please remember...I love fireworks. Oh, and my penis is average size…there you have it.
Myspace Layouts
