Hank / Ryan profile picture

Hank / Ryan

About Me

Went to school for a long time I did. Now I'm done. Moved to san francisco cuz I heard the streets were paved with gold and the taps spewed rubies. I didn't find that to be true exactly, so now I'm working in a coal mine just south of the city... you know, until things pick up a bit.Aside from the warm embrace of coal residue slowly eating its way through my lungs I enjoy many things about this fine city in which I now find myself. Just as soon as I get myself a nice place to live, one or two of my facial moles removed, and maybe even a girlfriend with teeth, I think my life's gonna start lookin up... yeah definitely, the sky's the limit you know? And to tell you the truth, I don't even really mind being in a wheel chair. I do wish I had both arms though, it'd make it a little easier to navigate those cramped coal mine corridors. But listen to me, goin on like I got somethin to be down about... I hear they're doing amazing things with prosthetics these days, amazing things...

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Buddha, Marley, Hendrix, Winston Churchill, Mark Twain, Jesus (I bet he'd be really nice and I need more black friends), Monica Lewinsky, Jeff Bridges, the Coen Brothers, and pretty much anybody who had anything whatsoever to do with the making of the Big Lebowski, Quentin Tarantino for that matter, Jessica Alba (So hot, so very, very hot...), All of the smurfs, but especially Smurfette, Q-bert (not the DJ, but that atari character with the funny nose... he was cool), Angelina Jolie and her lovely breasts, Christina Ricci, Bill Clinton, Matt Groening, everyone who works for ADULT SWIM, Teller but definitely not Penn, Butthead but definitely not Beavis, Jennifer Lopez's ass but definitely not the vapid skank that it's attached to, Douglas Adams, Jack Kerouac, Andy Warhol, Robert Anton Wilson, Einstein (Preferably while he was under the influence of LSD, which I hear he totally did), the beatles in their cartoon form from Yellow Submarine, Albert Hoffman, Alexander Shulgin, any current or past US Drug Czar, Jon Stewart, Bill O'Reilly (I'd kick him in the nuts I think), George W., Joan of Arc, Che Guiverra, that guy who totally wouldn't let Rosa Parks keep her damn seat, Mel Brooks, William Randolf Hearst, Eddie Murphy, Steven Wright, Mitch Hedberg, and ummm.... Orville Redenbacher.

My Blog

TooMuchTimeProgramming = Madness;

Behold the geekiness... BEHOLD IT!***BEGIN VISUAL BASIC CODE***Private Sub buttonRun_Click(ByVal sender As System.Object, ByVal e As System.EventArgs) Handles buttonRun.Click  Dim curCycle As Int...
Posted by on Sun, 20 Aug 2006 15:40:00 GMT

Muni Haiku

So about a month ago there was this breakdown on the Muni (SF's public transit subway thing) and it was a very trying experience. It was really interesting to see what large groups of random people do...
Posted by on Fri, 31 Mar 2006 23:12:00 GMT

Flashback

Eyes closed and a sharp jolt of panic prods me into conciousness... the clock, the clock!9:00 AM9-o-clock? What does that mean? 9 AM... still nothing. Beads of sweat begin to push their way out from u...
Posted by on Tue, 21 Mar 2006 17:05:00 GMT

Blog... that sounds scary.

"What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs Rolls over your neighbor's dog? What's great for a snack and fits on your back? It's Blog, Blog, Blog! It's Blog, Blog, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood. It's...
Posted by on Fri, 13 Jan 2006 23:13:00 GMT