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mmmSHELicious

mmmshelicious

About Me

R.I.P Bobby (2007)...R.I.P Chad (2008)...Chad-your passing shook me up-I would rather not know the truth behind it and that is why I didnt return her phone call-I know you know that. Now you are at peace and most of all with Bobby again, I know how much you missed your cousin. I still miss him!R.I.P Tita Nena (4/2008) & Uncle Tony Q (3/2008)

My Interests

It is like a mind-controlling disease. It makes you feel worthless and unknown. It has no mercy, whispering in your ear that life has no meaning. It tells you no one cares and why go on. It makes you feel like you have no purpose. You want to run and hide but you know it is close behind following you no matter how hard you try to escape. It tells you lies and says nasty things to you. It makes you feel empty inside. It takes a part of you away so you feel incomplete. This so called disease is called DEPRESSION.

I'd like to meet:

ROBERT P. MAYFIELD DECEMBER 25, 1972 ~ OCTOBER 08, 2007You can finally be at peace now Bobby-It saddens my heart that you are gone - but now you no longer suffer, now you no longer cry inside and now, you no longer fight depression. I know you lived each day in pain, suffering from all the hell you experienced since childhood. I stayed because I loved you and because I know you were not at fault. I wanted to help you by being there for you and allowing you to experience unconditional love and by your sign of lighting the night after you left us (10-9-07), you confirmed it all for me. I thank you for that Bobby, so until we meet again, you will be my Angel from God!

Movies:

A Place To Rest (by Alison)God looked down on your body, So tired from hanging on, From a life that was overwhelming you, And wanted back His son. So he took away the air you breathe, And gave you what was best, A place to be at peace, A final place to rest.

Books:

It was 3:00 am October 9, 2007 exactly 1 week ago today when I was awakened by the simutaneous noise of a loud banging on my door and the screeching ringing of my phone...I was scared, wondering "who the hell??"...not knowing that the next 10 seconds was going to change my life forever. At the same exact time, the person on my phone and the Walnut Creek PD at my door informed me of my boyfriends death...I am numb, still in shock, waiting for him to call, to visit me at work, to lay next to me, to argue with me just one last time...anything damnit! ... I forgave him for his mistakes, I loved him unconditionally but that was not enough...the nefarious cycle of DEPRESSION won the battle of his attention...if you know anyone who is depressed, just a little bit-reach out to them, get them some help...force them to seek therapy! The pain I feel is overbearing, yet it will never make me know the pain he lived through for most of his life. He no longer suffers-finally! He can be at peace and that is what helps me with my pain.

Heroes:

ROBERT P. MAYFIELD - I admire your strength and your courage to hold on for as long as you did. May your soul rest peacefully now... Thank you for sharing your life with me and for blessing me with you.