"Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would
permit us to be pirates."- Mark Twain, Life on the Mississippi
Four incompetent pirates with no fashion sense will entertain youse at your next function with an Ocean Fresh selection of jigs and reels, hornpipes and hosepipes (subject to current restrictions of course). Davey Jones' Locker will introduce you to the unique Piratical Tango, PLUS an alarming meet and greet technique which should loosen your guests up nicely.
AAAAAARRRRRHH!
These four pensionable privateers - recently returned from a life of copyright infringement and other piracy on the high ©s - are guaranteed Villains of the Deepest Dye:
'Dead Ear' McWhinnie: fiddling!
'Dead Wrong' Wrankstaffe: guitaharrrgh!
'Dead Man' Gangril: clarrrionet!
'Dead Beat' Fawcett-Upham: hitting things!
A - HAAAAARRRRRHH!
These pirates are very, very bad. They are possibly the worst pirates you've ever seen, and they're not afraid to admit it. That's why they've given it away and are now available for weddings, parties and workshops on anger management, men's issues, intellectual property rights and prosthetics. Why not invite them to walk YOUR plank?
AAAAAAARRRRRRGHH!
You'll be relieved to notice there's no music up yet. Enjoy the peace while it lasts.
Stinky , the Ship's Cat, comments:
' No Friends neither, but for that scurvie young Weevil Tom. But being Pyrates, we expect none, and being olde and possibly smelling a bit Funny, we expect doubly none. Can we not sign up Enemies? 'Twere heaps more Pyrate-like! (Ahaarrrrr!) Stick that up yer suggestion box, Tom lad.'
But what would you expect from the crispy undead ?
Davey Jones' Locker, however, has decided (after many a session with the West Belconnen Total Losers Mens' Group) to reach out and electronically caress its potential audience; and to honour its mentors and formative influences. In partickular: burlesque shows, humppa bands, religious radicals, self-help gurus and politicians.
(Note: some friends fall into more than one of these categories.)
'Fare forward, you who think that you are voyaging.' T.S.Eliot
'Where is there an end to the drifting wreckage...?' T.S.Eliot
'We are the stuffed men.' T.S.Eliot
