Well ive tried to avoid writing some bull shit that may describe who i might be at whatever time i decided to do this, but who cares what this usless piece of self description says anyways... Theres alot of things that ive been through in my pointless little life that ive been living. Most of it has been a big blurr, and when i say that i mean that i dont remember most of it. Dont get me wrong, i wish that i did remember it cause it has been the best years of my life. i can say that cause i know ive done more shit than alot of people my age. Well, when i say my age i mean still to young to know what is best for me, my son, and what i should do to make the most of this pathetic little exhistance i like to call life.
For so long ive been trying to fuigure out what to do with myself. Ive always wanted to be a helicopter pilot... Rescuing people like life flight, or piloting a camrea man for a major motion picture or, piloting those men to the gulf that drill all that fucking petrolem for us so we can drive our global warming causing cars to work. Anything! So long as i was in the air. Well that never happened... Almost, but not quite.
See what happened was i made the stupid decision to get drunk in Las Vegas, off 2 bottles of crown royal that the fucking limo driver purchased for some reason, and i happened to be there with me girlfriend (at the time) and her best friend, and my best friend... Well to make a long story short we got married? For BETTER or WORSE! "Dont EVER DO THAT!!!!!" I MEAN IT! In fact dont ever get married unless you know that you want to spend the rest of your life with that person. Good luck figuring that one out. I still dont know what that means.
So we had a child together, and by the way he is the cuitest little boy on the face of the planet. As you can see if youve looked at my profile. So at this point im thinking that im on top of the world, with a hottie wife, a new house i actually own, and a healthy, beautiful little son. Have you ever heard of that expression "dont count your chickens before they hatch" well theres a reason for that. I found out why, the hard way. Try having a new baby and a year later your supposed partner for life decides that they dont want to be with you any more, and theyre going to take the only thing you care about in this fucked up world away from you. Well since then ive been a lost soul. not knowing what i should do with myself. not knowing what direction i should take. All the while keeping in mind that im not just living for myself alone anymore, but for my son mostly. Well for about two years ive been lost..................................... yup lost...
i know what i should do, but i cant seem to do it.I will do it. For my SON... For Myself... For everyone that ive disapointed... For everyone that cares about me, if there is anyone left?
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