Quote(s) of the Day
Jen: You are my elevator of delicate goodness.
Reed: Heaven forbid your ramalama be seperated from your ding dong.
Don Richardson: Disney called. They want their princess back.
Matt Besser(of the Upright Citizens Brigade): I love your laugh. You laugh like your in an orgy and someone's fucking you and they accidentally do you up the butt, and you kind of liked it.
Robert: You're just a little fountain of love.
Reed: Discover your Amaliciousness
Reed: That's delicious, not malicious by the way.
Josh: The world needs you.
Reed: You don't want to be geek masturbation fodder?
Me: Been there, done that.
Reed: AMEN.
“I never asked you to earn me. I want only that you should need me. Your path is not one of merit. Bring the recurring desires of your mind to me, every time they emerge. They cannot shock me, for I willed them! Bring me your confusion, your fear, your craving, your anxiety, your inability to love the world, your hesitation to serve, your jealousy, all the deficiencies that defy your spiritual disciplines.â€
-Sri Sathya Sai Baba
I'm gonna find me a man, love him so well, love him so strong, love him so slow
We're gonna go way beyond the walls of this fortress
And we won't be afraid, we won't be afraid,
And though the darkness may come our way
We won't be afraid to be alive anymore
And we'll grow kindness in our hearts for all the strangers among us
Till there are no strangers anymore
Just call me Zombalimpylingalong.
Love in your heart isn't put there to stay
Love isn't love until you give it away
"I want to be naked running through the streets.
I want to invite this so called chaos that you'd think I dare not be.
I want to be weightless flying through the air.
I want to drop all these limitations at the shoes upon my feet..."
"Who'd a thought she'd become a Jedi Knight..."
I wish that I could be barefoot all the time. Music is the air that I breathe, I absorb everything I hear like a sponge. I take everything to heart, very deeply, but am a master at brushing the dirt off my shoulders a la Jay-Z. I can be shockingly honest and blunt, I say lots of stupid stuff... Let's be honest, I can be a total and complete ass. I can be funny when I'm not busy putting my foot in my mouth. I hate the term "foot in mouth." Mad Cow Disease is not my friend, but bird flu is my lover. It's one of my goals to make sense only ten percent of the time... it's easily achieved. I tend to never wear underwear. I have a love of potty humor and taco bell. I can make the most hideous faces and will stick my tongue out at any available opportunity(despite childhood warnings). I am obsessed with lip gloss, I cannot function without it. I get all stupid around dogs and cats, in fact, I resemble a retard. I wear my heart on my sleeve and it gets me into trouble sometimes. Okay, so it get's me into trouble all the time. People tell me I smell like sugar. I've got dance moves that could cut through butter. I love things that sparkle, I feed off of getting reactions from people... I like attention. I have bigger balls than most of the men in Los Angeles. I've found I can't abide boring humorless people, they make me want to stab myself in the eye. I am different, and I like that about myself. I'm married to comedy but am having torrid affairs with acting and singing on the side, it gets pretty sexy sometimes. Being mean to people makes me physically ill, I avoid it at all costs. I just want to love everyone all the time. Sometimes I sound like I'm full of myself, but really I'm just learning to love myself. I am an outrageous flirt, I flirt with everyone, a lot, all the time, but am one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet. Acid washed tapered jeans are the work of Satan. I actually feel kind of sorry for Britney Spears. I want ELO to play at my wedding. When I'm excited I talk wayyy too much. My toes are always painted. I'm pretty awesome.
"In the depth of my soul there is
A wordless song - a song that lives
In the seed of my heart.
It refuses to melt with ink on
Parchment; it engulfs my affection
In a transparent cloak and flows,
But not upon my lips.
It is a song composed by contemplation,
And published by silence,
And shunned by clamor,
And folded by truth,
And repeated by dreams,
And understood by love,
And hidden by awakening,
And sung by the soul."
-Khalil Gibran
"I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much; my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst. And then I remember to relax and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid. little. life. You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday."
-American Beauty
"I realize I use the word 'fuck' a lot, and I'd apologize for that, but I don't give a shit."
-Lewis Black
How to make an Amalia
Ingredients:
2 parts friendliness
3 parts craziness
1 part empathy
5 parts joy
Method:
Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Add curiosity to taste! Do not overindulge!
"And life is grand
And I will say this at the risk of falling from favor
With those of you who have appointed yourselves
To expect us to say something darker
And love is real
And though I realize this is not a deep observation
To those of you who find it necessary
To conceal love or obscure it, as is the fashion"
-Camper Van Beethoven
"Turn it up and make the speakers bleed"
"And I thought of that old joke, you know, the, this, this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, 'Doc, uh, my brother's crazy, he thinks he's a chicken,' and uh, the doctor says, 'well why don't you turn him in?' And the guy says, 'I would, but I need the eggs.' Well, I guess that's pretty much now how I feel about relationships. You know, they're totally irrational and crazy and absurd and, but uh, I guess we keep going through it...because...most of us need the eggs."
-Woody Allen in Annie Hall
"KISS ME AND YOU WILL SEE HOW IMPORTANT I AM."
-Sylvia Plath
The other day I picked up the phone to call you, cause baby it's been so long since I've heard your voice, but as I began to dial I realized my phone was sans numbers. Which was odd, most phones come standard with some sort of dialing device. At first, I just assumed it had changed, with out letting me know, and I tried screaming your beautiful name into the reciever. And that's when it hit me, like a falling anvil (bugs bunny style) that I had given them to a hobo in exchange for his fingerless gloves. They are just more gangster than regular gloves, you know, and you are quite aware of how important it is that i maintain my gangster reputation, otherwise all the other gangsters wont play with me. So thats why I couldn't call you, not because I dont love you --cause god damn do I love you, but because of my affinity for bartering with hobo's and that bastards ability to swallow plastic numbers but his inability to poop them out with in the expected 2-3 day time frame.
"Oh, mom, I haven't shenaniganned in six years. I've hooliganned, I've no-good-nicked, I've ne'er-do-welled, why just yesterday I found myself rabble-rousing..."
There's some women out there who talk and stare
Who never seem to let down their hair
Like to past judgment, but they're just scared
And don't know what they're missing,
So they better beware...
What we need in the United States is not hatred. What we need in the United States is not violence and lawlessness, but is love and wisdom and compassion toward one another.
-Robert F. Kennedy
"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one"
-John Lennon
"It might still be hard out here for a pimp, but it's not nearly as hard as it used to be. Pimps have been making the climb from subterranean purveyors of human flesh to celebrated pop culture figures. The flashy style and smooth talk no longer are solely owned by those wearing purple gators and large fur-trimmed hats. No, today anybody with the power to persuade, the ability to achieve or the bucks to bling can be considered a P-I-M-P.
So watch out world, here comes Amalia. "
-Tyler Galt