C A R L O [be_BRAVE] profile picture

C A R L O [be_BRAVE]

perseverance - continuing in a course of action without regard to discouragement, opposition, or pre

About Me


In Loving Memory of
MY DAD
May 18, 1941 - May 24th 2007
God saw you getting tired,
And a cure was not to be,
So He put his arms around you
And whispered "Come to Me"
With tearful eyes we
watched you suffer,
And saw you fall away.
Although we couldn't bear to
lose you, We could not ask you to stay.
A golden heart stopped beating,
Hardworking hands laid to rest.
God broke our hearts to prove us,
That He only takes the best.

I am an individual.
I am a leader, not a follower.
If you're my friend, I am the one
who will always have your back.
If you're my enemy, I am the one
your mother warned you about.
I am whoever I want to be.
Please allow me to introduce myself.
I AM I

CINESPACE IS BACK!
THURSDAY! SEPTEMBER 20
DUNKS AND DUKES
on the BRAVEHART guestlist

My Interests



WARNING
Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs, to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer" to target unsuspecting men. The drug is generally found in liquid form and is now available almost anywhere. It comes in bottles, in cans, from taps, and in large "kegs."

Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and have sex with them. Typically, a woman needs only to persuade a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no-strings-attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against this approach.

After several beers, men will often succumb to desires to perform sexual acts on horrific looking women to whom they would never normally be attracted.

After drinking Beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life savings, in a familiar scam known as "A Relationship." It has been reported that in extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer-term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "Marriage." Apparently, men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

Please forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this insidious Beer and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups with venues in every town where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter in an open and frank manner with similarly affected, like-minded guys.

For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the yellow pages.

I'd like to meet:


Dear Alcohol,

First and foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when you're needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around on the holidays, hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings.

However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unfortunate consequences:

1.) Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2.) Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with Del Scorcho sauce, along with a big juicy cheesburger and some stale chips (washed down with wine and topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls & deluxe chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time...

3.) Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see no need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black and blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Furthermore, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

4.) Finally, The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is seriously getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3 p.m. hangover-induced immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin, milk thistle) prior to going to sleep and/or passing out face down on the kitchen floor hugging a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal and in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now and I would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above and address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Friday 5:05 p.m. (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions and hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
Your ..1 Fan
You're a Wild Drunk
You can't get enough drinks. Seriously, you'll just go puke and start pounding them back again! What Kind of Drunk Are You?

WATER... It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli bacteria found in feces, in other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of SHIT!

However, we do not run that risk when drinking BOOZE (wine, rum, whiskey, vodka, beer or other liquors) because alcohol has to go through a distillation process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.

WATER = SHIT
BOOZE = HEALTH

Free yourself of Poop, drink BOOZE!!! It is better to drink booze and talk shit, than to drink water and be full of shit.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information, I am doing it as a public service.

Music:

i want a lover but i can't find the time
i want a reason but i can't find a rhyme

Movies:

yes

Books:

yea soon

My Blog

i don't add people i don't personally know...

so i if i've never met you, don't try adding my ass...
Posted by C A R L O [be_BRAVE] on Tue, 07 Mar 2006 06:49:00 PST