The Lowdown On The Scouts...
Scouts In Skirts are a renegade scout troop from West Sussex, they work from home as mercenarys; soldiers of fortune to the world of scouting and music, after Lord Badene Powelle rubbished the group as neo-classical Michael Jackson impersonators and was even rumoured to have been quoted as saying "Yeah, I don't like them" - disturbing I think you'll agree.
Formed by ex-frontman Rabbitte Manne, keyboardist Hazel Danger and bassist Chikky Makane during an outing to the old mill in february 2003, they didnt think to start making music untill mid 2006, after line-up shuffles and love-ins had seen Panther Star 3.5 and Seventy Piratus join the fray. They have now recorded seven songs in as many minutes; each of which far exceeds the 1 minute mark - perplexing, yes. The Scouts In Skirts sound is a unique sound, many would say highly cultured by foreign influences and funerals. The SIS mix an onslaught of fresh, happenin' beats with a thunderous lack of bass and tinny, distorted guitars whilst stirring in some quirky keyboards with a giant wooden spoon. So quirky, even Pauliine Quiirke would be proud - she is rumoured to be a huge fan of quirkiness.
With such a solid slab of musical prestige, Trent Bahrain's not-digeridoo gives SIS an "X" factor, and guitarist Thorsten Catnip's use of the kazoo will blow your mind away. You may want to sit down before listening.
Alas the first incarnation of the band died a death upon a wet, slippery mountain one winters eve and has not been heard from since. Rest assured however, they are not really dead and are only pretending, so as to trick bears and gnats. However, while we may have recruited new members, if you cross us we will send round Badene-Powelle to lick your food before you eat it, then not tell you and let you eat while he giggles in the corner and you wonder why he's giggling, and you say to yourself "why is Lord Baddene-Powelle giggling?" ...it's cos he licked your food.
The lyrics of the SiS are equally enjoyable to transgender persons as they are to us "normal" folk; but what makes a person normal? We dont know, but with us guiding you, perhaps we can all find out together. Like trapped wind, our lyrics first are painful, but then full of relief.
You've been Rogered...
Scouts honour
What people have said of the SiS...
"Scouts In Skirts... Yeh they're menaces aren't they?" (Rory Attwell/Raary Deci-hells - Rat:Att:Agg/Test-Icicles)
"Oh when will i be king" (Prince Naseem Windsor)
"I love being king" (King Herod Windsor)
"Eee Lyyr Skaaet Nyyn Sqqqrtx, Taey Rrra Gqhnnnda" (Flannelus)
"Eee Akkryt" (Crumlon)
"Scouts In Skirts possess the strength of ten men. Who each possess the strength of ten men. In Other words the strength of one hundred men." (Konrad Floater - Labour Party)
"When you hear these songs of arduous angst and mirth wrapped in the bittersweet caramelised longing for justifiable existence it makes you forget what you first started talking about." (Spokesabiotic for Scotland)
"There is nothing I liked better in the heady days of Brit-Pop than smashing in 15 goals a game for my team, Manchester City, then going home to my wife and kids and forcing them at gunpoint to listen to the glorious music of Scouts In Skirts (Gary Flick-comb)
"I broke down again and cried long after the songs had finished. " (Panther Star 3.5)
"Do you like to dance? Do you like to fall-over? Do you like to blend the two, in order to keep the masses guessing? Scouts In Skirts deliver all of the aforementioned." (Djibrille Seesaw)
"It's embracing the cut and paste ethic of todays underground society, its at once full of hope yet bleak. " (Gorge-Bush Snr.)
"You guys had the special stuff inside you all along." (Michael Jordan - Space Jam)
"Scouts In Skirts possess the strength of 10 men, Who each posses the strength of 10 men. In other words the strength of 100 men. (Alphonse brown, le dinde son of the JB - Jaaaaaaaames Broooooooown)
"Yer music makes me feel fantabuliciouslyish good!" (madamesaucy from MySpace)
"If only i had the amount of money the Scouts do. I would spend it on birds, booze and drugs.
...Then I would put some pound coins in a sock and smash in the heads of the poor." (Liberty Valance)
"i heard your music n its well dead good." (Lawrah-like lightning--- from MySpace)
"Clinically proven to cause orgasm" (Dr McEnery, Univerisity of Jess)
"It's a call to arms for every man woman and child to get out of their seat and fight for what they believe in." (Firm Britton, This Morning)
"Passable" (Badene Powelle, Scout Leader/Founder/Male)
"Take your filthy hands off me!" (Female)
"ooh, you boyth thound like early genethith!!" (Julie Osey, 21, resident of Piley)
"I first met the Scouts in a doorway at a nice place. They seemed very nice. I like them. Sometimes I like to listen to their songs and imagine a better world; a bit like Venus maybe, but not as hot and nasty.' (Chris Akabustop)
"Mothers have always sung lullabies to their children to sooth them and the Love Brigade album collects together the most famous and memorable classical lullabies to calm, relax and help your baby fall fast asleep" (K'Nicket Caraticket - Reviewer for the New York Times"
"so you're a bit like god" (Elizabeth from MySpace)
"Time is running out for Scouts In Skirts" (Some Lawyers)
"Wassabi-Sauce!" (Godzilla - Giant Mutant Monster)
"Scouts In Skirts seem like the kind of guys that invite you over to their house, and when you get there they're just really happy to see you for some reason. And you go into their room and you see that they still have Care Bears on their beds, and their mum makes you celery sticks, and your thinking 'wow these guys grew up on the sunny side of lollypop lane'. But then as you're leaving you find a note in their desk drawer that has a list of the top ten ways they would like to disembowel a cat, complete with diagrams. But before you leap out of the nearest window you just kind of shake it off, assuming you're going a bit crazy cos you've been over-exposed to niceness. Kind of like sun stroke." (Signally Weavilly)
"...And unto us the Lord did giveth the Scouts emblazoned in thier Skirts, they shall henceforth be forever known as Scouts In Skirts. Jesus smiled, and the world did boogie" (Dancing Bishop - Head Of The Church Of SiS)
"'My Daddy loved hazel danger and his Daddy loved hazel danger." (Charltone Hestone)
"When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city to see the Scouts In Skirts" (Gerarde Waye - Leader of the Black Parade)
"Scouts In Skirts take things that should not be; indeed, often things that plainly 'are not' and peruse the musical landscape before them, searching for the perfect resting places for these 'not-things'... I've seen them putting reggae peppers in a skiffle slurry. Can we believe anything nowadays? I often doubt it... It is for this reason alone, that David Seaman grew a pony-tail. Scouts In Skirts, I welcome you into my heart, my country, but never into my home, because we've put up a new daedo-rail." (Fiddle Cats-toe, speaking at a Queue ban meeting)
"Not as good as Pogs" (!4 year old School boy from Bishop's Waltham) - unfortunatly after this statement was made Trent decided to exact revenge on the small boy by dressing him as a dog and making him pretend he was the boy from "Woof". .
Recently those lovely SiS boys were subject to being the main thrust of one of the greatest essays of modern times.
View the full essay here
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