Joanna

I'd like to meet:

Your Life: The Soundtrack
Opening credits: House of Pain: Jump Around
Waking up: Blur: Coffee and TV
Average day: Phoenix: Everything is Everything
First date: Lil' Kim: Crush on You
Falling in love: Foo Fighters: Everlong
Love scene: The Roots: Break You Off
Fight scene: Big Pun: Off Wit His Head
Breaking up: Zero 7: In the Waiting Line
Getting back together: Cardigans: Lovefool
Secret love: Buzzcocks: Ever Fallen in Love?
Life's okay: Tribe Called Quest: Award Tour
Mental breakdown: Black Flag: I've Had It
Driving: Grateful Dead: Tennesee Jed
Learning a lesson: 311: Beyond the Gray Sky
Deep thought: Morcheeba: The Sea
Flashback: Ahmed: Back in the Day
Partying: Nelly Furtado: Party
Happy dance: Bjork: More to Life
Regreting: Beck: Loser
Long night alone: Eels: I Need Some Sleep
Death scene: Bjork: Hidden Place
Closing credits: Kool and the Gang: Joanna
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In a Past Life...
You Were: An Arrogant Chief.

Where You Lived: Poland.

How You Died: Natural causes. Who Were You In a Past Life?Honest people. Craig Johnson. Cubans. Craig Johnson. Crispy Niggas. The wealthy yet humble. Rude mechanics. Generous creative types with gorgeous hands. Good tippers. Minimum wagers. Optimists. Realists. DJs. Anyone who can drive stick. Old souls in young bodies. Private investigators. Bali Hai smokers. People on work release. Tiny handed therapists. Mets fans. Hash slingers. The tattooed. Quiet Cherokees. Lovers. Fighters. Reformed haters. Anyone with Monk-esque personality traits. The inventor of Seroquel. Huggy Bear. Transit cops. Rice writers. Parents of serial killers. Good listeners. Contortionists. The walking lady of Lake Worth. Marcia Brady. Recovering spoon benders. Snow cone vendors. Rhyme schemers. Day dreamers. Fraiser Crane. David Blaine. People who can tolerate pain. The diligent. The bold. The persistently dutiful. Those who know that life is beautiful. Craig Johnson.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Craig M Johnson
Birthday: July 8th 1949
Birthplace: Philadelphia, PA
Current Location: Pompano, FL
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Salt and Peppa
Height: 5'8"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Righty Tighty
Your Heritage: I'm a Black man, that's alls I know
The Shoes You Wore Today: Reebok Pumps, baby!
Your Weakness: Cheetos, Thick lil mamas, cream soda, strawberry parfay from McD's
Your Fears: None, I trust in the Lord Jesus Christ
Your Perfect Pizza: Hamchovie
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Lose my spare tire
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: I never check my voicemail
Thoughts First Waking Up: Glory day!
Your Best Physical Feature: I can grow a chinstrap
Your Bedtime: 11pm
Your Most Missed Memory: Eatin Jiffy Pop with my mama!!!
Pepsi or Coke: Mr.Pibb
MacDonalds or Burger King: This man don't discriminate
Single or Group Dates: Orgys are a sin
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Mr.Pibb
Chocolate or Vanilla: I am coocoo for cocoalate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Mr.Pibb
Do you Smoke: I enjoy a Black and Mild from time to time
Do you Swear: Nah, cause everytime I do I gots to give Loretta a dollar!
Do you Sing: To my woman! And Jesus Lord
Do you Shower Daily: I clean myself when I dirty myself
Have you Been in Love: Me and my Loretta been in love since the dawn of creation
Do you want to go to College: Mr.Pibb
Do you want to get Married: I am married!
Do you belive in yourself: If Jesus does than I do
Do you get Motion Sickness: No, I'm a pretty happy guy
Do you think you are Attractive: I was created in the image of the Lord
Are you a Health Freak: Crispy!
Do you get along with your Parents: My papa was a rolling stone and my mama gone to heaven when I was 19
Do you like Thunderstorms: Only if my car is dirty
Do you play an Instrument: The spoons
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Mr.Pibb
In the past month have you Smoked: I have
In the past month have you been on : NO!
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Me and Loretta went to the Sizzler and then a bargin matinee
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Nah man
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No, but I did eat a tub of cookies and cream all by my lonesome
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: It not cooked!
In the past month have you been on Stage:
In the past month have you been Dumped: I am a married man!
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: In my bathtub
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Just Lorettas heart
Ever been Drunk: Shameful, in the name of LORD
Ever been called a Tease: I don't tease nobody. Bullies are mean
Ever been Beaten up: Once as a child for my milk money
Ever Shoplifted: Once I took some fishing lures, but God told me to bring them back
How do you want to Die: Praising!
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: I am grown!
What country would you most like to Visit: Topeka, KS
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Lorettas eyes are bright like the night sky
Favourite Hair Color: She changes her weaves, but my favorite it the caramel colored one
Short or Long Hair: She could be balded and on fire and she would still be an angel
Height: my baby 5'4"
Weight: Shes a brick house
Best Clothing Style: Her Sunday best
Number of I have taken: Mr. Pibb
Number of CDs I own: I only got a tape deck in my car
Number of Piercings: none
Number of Tattoos: absolutely never!
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Life before coupons

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
Your movie star name: Pretzels Carlo

Your fashion designer name is Joanna Prauge

Your socialite name is Jo Jo Bean New York

Your fly girl / guy name is J Kni

Your detective name is Penguin Pleasantville

Your barfly name is Yogurt Gin

Your soap opera name is Beth Clinton

Your rock star name is Resses Ferrari

Your Star Wars name is Joaruf Kniton

Your punk rock band name is The Calm Dart The Amazing Meganame Generator

Music:

(In no particular order) Gogol Bordello,Beatnuts, Bjork, Portishead, Morcheeba, Dinosaur Jr., Sonic Youth, Screeching Weasel, White Zombie, Op Ivy, A Tribe Called Quest, Wu Tang Clan, Led Zeppelin, Johnny Cash, Atmosphere, The Clash, Tool, Gipsy Kings, The RZA, Pixies, OutKast, 311, The Pharcyde, Deftones, Weezer, LL Cool J (he's from Queens, so shut it!) Jamiroquai, Dropkick Murpheys, Grateful Dead, ANYONE in the ever-talented Marley family, Cake, Cheap Trick, Beastie Boys, old ass club shit like Madison Avenue, good ol Samba like Jorge Ben

Movies:

The Departed, The Kill Bills, Anything Tarentino basically, Everything is Illuminated, Little Miss Sunshine, Deliverance, Vanilla Sky, About a Boy, Zoolander,Big Lebowski, Fargo, Anchorman, Green Mile, The Godfathers, Scarface, Fearless, American Dreamz, What About Bob, Summer of Sam, Love the Hard Way, The Pianist, Home Alone (shut up), Song Remains the Same, This is Spinal Tap
You scored as Jigsaw, You are Jigsaw. You dont enjoy killing people at all. You instead love to see how far people will go to live. However if it ends in a bloody death, you still sleep with a smile on your face. You are intelligent, and know how to outwit just about anyone. And that spells bad news for anyone who falls into your games of death and torture.

Candyman

Jigsaw

Hannibal Lecter

Pinhead

Leatherface

Freddy Krueger

Michael Myers

Buffalo Bill

Jason Voorhees

Captain Spaulding

Television:

The Office, Home Movies, Frasier, Mr. Wizard (RIP), not too much television viewing going on in my life
Your Superhero Profile
Your Superhero Name is The Tomorrow Chameleon
Your Superpower is Rapping
Your Weakness is Stuttering
Your Weapon is Your Magic Crossbow
Your Mode of Transportation is Motor Home What's your Superhero Name?

Books:

The Harry Potters, Art of War, The Prince, Conversations with God, I Know This Much is True, Much of Nietzsche, Gospel According to Gracie, I Am a Sex Addict, Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy, Dry, Anything by Augusten Burroughs, Horton Hears a Who (a lifelong classic) and of course, the "big" one.

Heroes:

Those who rise above the expectations of others