I know every song ever recorded and who should be covering it today. I know every movie and tv show ever made and who should be directing/starring in the re-make. I'm kidding, of course, but there's a little truth in every joke.
Sorry, ladies, I'm taken. Try to control your tears.
Don't steal my stuff. Stay off my Lay-Z-Boy. Don't un-alphabatize my music. Don't delete shit off my TiVo. That's all I ask in life.
