North London is my undeserted home and place of birth. It's changed a lot over the last 29 years, but, like a young lover, I am still unfailingly enamoured and surprised by it; especially when the weather is conducive to long walks on Hampstead Heath, followed by al fresco dining, swimming in the murky, refreshing ponds or just watching the millions of faces light up for the sun, in true English, weather-obsessive fashion. Especially, also, when autumn turns this planet's greenest Capital into an unashamed palate of plentiful rusty hues. Glorious! Whenever I am smart enough to open my eyes, I see the opportunities granted by such a sizeable, dynamic place. Yes, indeed.But enough of that, the intent of this Myspace page is to share my poetry, so please read it. Feedback is enormously desired! * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *More about me....I’m not entirely certain how to define myself, for how can I define that which is not static? I am a young female; a daughter, a sister, an employee, a colleague, a stranger, a friend and sometimes a lover. And, in all these, I perform various roles; acting innumerable parts to comply with the necessities of these assorted functions and oftentimes falling short in that endeavour.My life thus far has been struggle for self-understanding; a beguiling, though bewildering expedition to nowhere. For, I find the more I learn to understand myself, that is to say the more I can predict my choices, responses and emotions, the more futile I find my existence. However, from that disillusionment a realisation and relaxation into existence springs.I have lately become aware of the strong denial of my true self that has overshadowed a large chunk of my life. I am a far more pensive, introspective, passionate, artistic and eccentric person than I have allowed myself to see or feel for this lengthy time. I have taken on the role of clown; clumsy, fun-loving, carefree, alcohol-adoring, sometimes confident and at others merely bored. A badly acted role indeed, I am certain. But, what must be understood, is that the primary and most ardent audience member was myself, and I bought it hook, line and sinker, surprisingly often. I am fairly certain that those of you who know me have seen vast cracks in this mask, manifesting the appearance of a somewhat miscellaneous and frustrated, distressed façade. I feel I am now beginning to outgrow this identity and burgeoning into a truer, more cohesive self...
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