ANTandDEC (to ask which one would like to be shot first)....GORDON BROWN (poor man, he needs a friend)...DAVID DICKENSON (to ask him if he would kindly retire)....POSTMAN PAT (to find out if the rumours about him and Mrs Goggins are true)....GEORGE BUSH (I like a good laugh)....MAHATMA GANDHI (so I can insult his tailor)....JUDAS ESCARIOT (so I can thump him one)....ELVIS (so I can ask him if any of his impersonators are actualy him)...BERT WEEDON (it was all his bloody fault..thanks Bert!)...........